Thank you! Don't forget to confirm subscription in your email.
The events leading up to an 11:14 PM car crash, from five very different perspectives.
Eddie: Did you get it? Did you get it? [Tim throws Eddie's severed penis onto his lap] Tim: Don't say I never did anything for you.
Officer Hannagan: [talking to a medic] We got a human penis right there by the curb. Somebody's gotta be looking for that.
Officer Hannagan: How 'bout the penis?
Mark: [referring to Eddie's penis] Tim, it's been cut off! Tim: So they can reattach it. Mark: Well how the fuck are they gonna do that? Tim: What am I, a surgeon? They use leeches and shit. Mark: This is so stupid! What about the cops? Tim: Just be here when I get back.
Officer Hannagan: Don't move! Norma: You'll burn for what you did to my daughter! Jack: [confused] Daughter?
Frank: [after Mark throws a jelly donut at his windshield] Stupid little shits!
Eddie: What's with the books? [Tim holds up a book and tries to light it on fire] Eddie: You're gonna burn a book? Tim: It's not like this is great fucking literature or anything. I'm doing the world a favor.
Norma: This can't be happening. Jack: What happened? Norma: Chief Garby called. My only child has been hit by a car. Jack: They just called? Norma: Right after I came home, just a few minutes after I left you.
Tim: Dude, you just broke my box. Eddie: Yeah, you're mom told me that last night.
Duffy: [after Buzzy accidentally shoots the glass of a refrigerator] What the fuck is wrong with you?
Frank: So is that Aaron's car outside? I thought you weren't seeing him anymore? Cheri: I'm not. Frank: Then what's he doing back here? Cheri: We're just hanging out. Frank: Cheri, Cheri. I do not trust that guy. Cheri: So you said. Frank: Look at me. If he hits you again, I'll kill him. Cheri: I can take care of myself.
Duffy: Where the fuck's my bowling ball?
[last lines] Duffy: [holding a bag of money] Cheri! I got it! Cheri: [yelling back to Duffy] My car won't start. Jack: [on Cheri's cell phone] Hello? Are you still there? Cheri: [talking to Jack] Listen, I might get Duffy's half after all. I'll call you back.
[first lines] Jack: [talking on his cell phone] I'm on my way back from Benny's. I'm almost home. Tell me where you are and I'll come get you.
Buzzy: You do what you gotta do, but I'm not going to open up this drawer. [Duffy points his pistol at her] Duffy: Look at me. Buzzy: Why, so you could shoot me in the face? Duffy: C'mon, just look at me. [Buzzy still refuses] Duffy: Goddamnit, you're so stubborn!
Mark: [after coming up with a story to tell the cops] You hear that Eddie? I never hit you. Eddie: Why should I lie? Mark: What are you talking about? Eddie: Why should I lie, when this is all your fault? Mark: My fault? How the fuck is this my fault? Eddie: Well if you hadn't been so worried about your paint job, my penis would be in my pants right now and not in my fucking hand!
Eddie: [after Tim accidentally hits Eddie with the van's window] Fuck me man, that was my head!