Years after he turned his back on his hometown, a burned-out major league ballplayer returns to teach phys ed at his old middle school.

Kenny Powers: Fuck that noise!
Ashley Schaeffer: I had a dream about this moment... When I was making love... to my wife Donna. On top a her; powerful thrusts, filling the sultry night air. Heavy breath. My son Gabriel walked in, little boy. My wife sprung out of bed and said "No, Gabriel! Leave!" And I said "No, honey, shut your mouth, let him watch." Let him watch what is being consecrated here. And I want the people to watch what is going to be consecrated here. And I will bring my son down here, and he will watch.
Reg Mackworthy: When did you become such a pussy? I mean, you've always been a pussy. But now you're like a vagina with a mullet.
Casper: Hey, Stevie. Did you get cancer?