Homicide: Life on the Street Quotes
A police homicide investigation unit investigates violent crimes in the city of Baltimore.
Det. Tim Bayliss: You still believe that my cousin killed that boy because he was an Arab?
Det. Frank Pembleton: Hikmet was not an Arab. Turks are not Arabs...
Det. Tim Bayliss: My cousin could not consciously kill someone.
Det. Frank Pembleton: I don't think it was premeditated. I think it was inherent. Jim's racism is so much a part of him, that he didn't have a chance to think about what he was doing. Jim is worse than a Klansman. 'Cause at least in their white sheets, they are recognizable. Your cousin's brand of bigotry is much more frightening because, like still water, it runs deep. He doesn't even see it himself.
Det. Tim Bayliss: You're wrong, dead wrong.
Det. Frank Pembleton: The only one "dead wrong" is Hikmet Gersel. Did you see what happened when the verdict was announced? They applauded. Those law-abiding citizens, those good people applauded the death of a child. Let me ask you something, Tim - and then you tell me whether or not it was racially motivated - if that boy had been American, if that boy had been white - do you think anyone would have cheered?
Det. Frank Pembleton: Hikmet was not an Arab. Turks are not Arabs...
Det. Tim Bayliss: My cousin could not consciously kill someone.
Det. Frank Pembleton: I don't think it was premeditated. I think it was inherent. Jim's racism is so much a part of him, that he didn't have a chance to think about what he was doing. Jim is worse than a Klansman. 'Cause at least in their white sheets, they are recognizable. Your cousin's brand of bigotry is much more frightening because, like still water, it runs deep. He doesn't even see it himself.
Det. Tim Bayliss: You're wrong, dead wrong.
Det. Frank Pembleton: The only one "dead wrong" is Hikmet Gersel. Did you see what happened when the verdict was announced? They applauded. Those law-abiding citizens, those good people applauded the death of a child. Let me ask you something, Tim - and then you tell me whether or not it was racially motivated - if that boy had been American, if that boy had been white - do you think anyone would have cheered?
Det. Mike Kellerman: I just want you to know that I'm here for you. And if you want a hug, I'd be happy to give you one.
Det. Tim Bayliss: A hug?
Det. Mike Kellerman: Yeah.
Det. Tim Bayliss: Do you and Lewis hug?
Det. Mike Kellerman: Yeah.
Det. Tim Bayliss: A lot?
Det. Mike Kellerman: No, not a lot.
Det. Tim Bayliss: But enough.
Det. Mike Kellerman: What do you mean?
Det. Tim Bayliss: Well, do you want Lewis to hug you more?
Det. Mike Kellerman: Forget I brought this all up.
Det. Tim Bayliss: No, no, no, no. *You* brought up the hugging thing.
Det. Tim Bayliss: A hug?
Det. Mike Kellerman: Yeah.
Det. Tim Bayliss: Do you and Lewis hug?
Det. Mike Kellerman: Yeah.
Det. Tim Bayliss: A lot?
Det. Mike Kellerman: No, not a lot.
Det. Tim Bayliss: But enough.
Det. Mike Kellerman: What do you mean?
Det. Tim Bayliss: Well, do you want Lewis to hug you more?
Det. Mike Kellerman: Forget I brought this all up.
Det. Tim Bayliss: No, no, no, no. *You* brought up the hugging thing.
[Bolander, the primary investigator into the suicide of Detective Steve Crosetti, is being pressured to rule it a murder]
Det. Stan Bolander: Is that what you're asking, Lieutenant? To make it a murder? A murder with no murderer? A murder that can't be solved? If you order me to do it, I'll do it. Hell, my clearance rate is so low these days one more open murder isn't going to make much difference. Everyone says 'Do it for Steve', and I keep thinking that if he chose to commit suicide, what right to I have - what right does ANY of us have - to make that go away? I don't agree with what he did, but if that was his final statement, should I wipe that clear just for our peace of mind? I mean, nobody wants to admit it, but everyone knows what happened.
Det. Stan Bolander: Is that what you're asking, Lieutenant? To make it a murder? A murder with no murderer? A murder that can't be solved? If you order me to do it, I'll do it. Hell, my clearance rate is so low these days one more open murder isn't going to make much difference. Everyone says 'Do it for Steve', and I keep thinking that if he chose to commit suicide, what right to I have - what right does ANY of us have - to make that go away? I don't agree with what he did, but if that was his final statement, should I wipe that clear just for our peace of mind? I mean, nobody wants to admit it, but everyone knows what happened.
Det. Paul Falsone: You know, I was thinking of printing up one of those bikini calendars. You know, the cops of Baltimore type thing.
Det. Rey Curtis: What happened?
Det. Paul Falsone: You seen the cops in Baltimore?
Det. Rey Curtis: You're right. Munch in a thong would be a little hard on the eyes.
Det. Rey Curtis: What happened?
Det. Paul Falsone: You seen the cops in Baltimore?
Det. Rey Curtis: You're right. Munch in a thong would be a little hard on the eyes.
Det. Frank Pembleton: You know, every day I get out of bed and drag myself to the next cup of coffee. I take a sip and the caffeine kicks in. I can focus my eyes again. My brain starts to order the day. I'm up, I'm alive. I'm ready to rock. But the time is coming when I wake up and decide that I'm not getting out of bed. Not for coffee, or food or sex. If it comes to me, fine. If it won't, fine. No more expectations. The longer I live, the less I know. I should know more. I should know the coffee's killing me. You're suspicious of your suspicions? I'm jealous, Kay; I'm so jealous. You still have the heart to have doubts. Me? I'm going to lock up a 14-year-old kid for what could be the rest of his natural life. I got to do this. This is my job. This is the deal. This is the law. This is my day. I have no doubts or suspicions about it. Heart has nothing to do with it any more. It's all in the caffeine.
Det. Tim Bayliss: Fourteen years old... When I was fourteen, jeez, I was in the ninth grade, and I don't remember much of what I was doing, but I know I was nowhere close to picking up a gun and shooting another kid.
Det. Frank Pembleton: How old should our shooter be?
Det. Tim Bayliss: Not fourteen.
Det. Frank Pembleton: So if he's what, fifteen, sixteen years old, it makes any more sense?
Det. Tim Bayliss: No.
Det. Frank Pembleton: How old should he be then? What's the cut off age? Seventeen? Eighteen?
Det. Tim Bayliss: I don't know, but not fourteen.
Det. Frank Pembleton: When you find out, clue me in, awright? I'd like to know when any of this killing, at any age, from six to sixty, makes any sense. One time I want to hear about a murder that makes sense. Just one time. For any reason.
Det. Frank Pembleton: How old should our shooter be?
Det. Tim Bayliss: Not fourteen.
Det. Frank Pembleton: So if he's what, fifteen, sixteen years old, it makes any more sense?
Det. Tim Bayliss: No.
Det. Frank Pembleton: How old should he be then? What's the cut off age? Seventeen? Eighteen?
Det. Tim Bayliss: I don't know, but not fourteen.
Det. Frank Pembleton: When you find out, clue me in, awright? I'd like to know when any of this killing, at any age, from six to sixty, makes any sense. One time I want to hear about a murder that makes sense. Just one time. For any reason.
Det. Stan Bolander: Sometimes I wanna call my wife just to hear the sound of her voice. But I know that five minutes into that phone call, my blood pressure is going through the roof, the phone is sailing across the room and I'm wishing that she's on a plane falling out of the sky. It's over. I know it's over. But I had to replace six telephones before I, I really got the hint.
[Bolander sees bird droppings on his car]
Det. Stan Bolander: Would you look at this? Pigeons!
Det. John Munch: Not from a pigeon, it's from a waterfowl.
Det. Stan Bolander: A what?
Det. John Munch: A waterfowl. From a mallard.
Det. Stan Bolander: A duck?
Det. John Munch: A well-fed duck.
Det. Stan Bolander: Right, like you can tell the difference. That couldn't come from a seagull, I suppose?
Det. John Munch: No, gulls have a milky white splurter. Notice the lobular pattern, these splays within splays.
Det. Stan Bolander: Munch... why do you know these things?
Det. Stan Bolander: Would you look at this? Pigeons!
Det. John Munch: Not from a pigeon, it's from a waterfowl.
Det. Stan Bolander: A what?
Det. John Munch: A waterfowl. From a mallard.
Det. Stan Bolander: A duck?
Det. John Munch: A well-fed duck.
Det. Stan Bolander: Right, like you can tell the difference. That couldn't come from a seagull, I suppose?
Det. John Munch: No, gulls have a milky white splurter. Notice the lobular pattern, these splays within splays.
Det. Stan Bolander: Munch... why do you know these things?
Det. John Munch: [Bayliss is taking some pills for his back pain] What d'ya got there, Timmy? Some good stuff, huh? Percodan, Percocet, Tylenol, greenies?
Det. Tim Bayliss: They're muscle relaxants!
Det. John Munch: Even better.
Det. Tim Bayliss: You don't get any!
Det. John Munch: No-one's willing to share their drugs anymore.
Det. Tim Bayliss: They're muscle relaxants!
Det. John Munch: Even better.
Det. Tim Bayliss: You don't get any!
Det. John Munch: No-one's willing to share their drugs anymore.
Det. John Munch: You're saving your really good lies for some smarter cop, is that it? I'm just a donut in the on-deck circle. Wait until the real guy gets here. Wait until that big guy comes back. I'm probably just his secretary. I'm just Montel Williams. You want to talk to Larry King.
Bernard: I'm telling you the truth.
Det. John Munch: I've been in murder police for ten years. If you're going to lie to me, you lie to me with respect. What is it? Is it my shoes? Is it my haircut? Got a problem with my haircut? Don't you ever lie to me like I'm Montel Williams. I am not Montel Williams. I am not Montel Williams.
Bernard: Who's Montel Williams?
Det. John Munch: I'm not Montel Williams.
Bernard: I'm telling you the truth.
Det. John Munch: I've been in murder police for ten years. If you're going to lie to me, you lie to me with respect. What is it? Is it my shoes? Is it my haircut? Got a problem with my haircut? Don't you ever lie to me like I'm Montel Williams. I am not Montel Williams. I am not Montel Williams.
Bernard: Who's Montel Williams?
Det. John Munch: I'm not Montel Williams.
[Pembleton needs the clothes of a brain-dead child for evidence]
Det. Frank Pembleton: I need you to give me these clothes.
Joan Garbarek: I can't.
Det. Frank Pembleton: You have to!
Joan Garbarek: I *have* to? Let me tell you what I *have* to do today, okay? I have to go in there and I have to watch the doctors pinch Patrick's legs. I have to watch them stick pins at the bottoms of his feet. I have to watch them pour cold water, first in his right ear, then in his left, to see if his eyes moved today. And I have to hear them tell me that they don't. His eyes don't. I hear them say this. Nothing else can be done. And this is just a little *boy*! And they have to say this about him? *You* have to have his clothes? *You* have to know what we saw yesterday? I have to remember... Patrick standing there, he *has* to see the dinosaurs! He *has* to go to that window! It's always "one more minute!" He *always* has to do what he wants! And then he falls down and I think he's just teasing and he's going to get up in a minute and I'm going to yell at him to just get up and not get dirty! I *want* to see him get up... from his *own* bed. Do I have to think that he can lay there like this for another 50 or 60 years? Do I have to think that this is what he wants? Why do I have to? Why do I think that it can't be Patrick in there?
Det. Frank Pembleton: I need you to give me these clothes.
Joan Garbarek: I can't.
Det. Frank Pembleton: You have to!
Joan Garbarek: I *have* to? Let me tell you what I *have* to do today, okay? I have to go in there and I have to watch the doctors pinch Patrick's legs. I have to watch them stick pins at the bottoms of his feet. I have to watch them pour cold water, first in his right ear, then in his left, to see if his eyes moved today. And I have to hear them tell me that they don't. His eyes don't. I hear them say this. Nothing else can be done. And this is just a little *boy*! And they have to say this about him? *You* have to have his clothes? *You* have to know what we saw yesterday? I have to remember... Patrick standing there, he *has* to see the dinosaurs! He *has* to go to that window! It's always "one more minute!" He *always* has to do what he wants! And then he falls down and I think he's just teasing and he's going to get up in a minute and I'm going to yell at him to just get up and not get dirty! I *want* to see him get up... from his *own* bed. Do I have to think that he can lay there like this for another 50 or 60 years? Do I have to think that this is what he wants? Why do I have to? Why do I think that it can't be Patrick in there?
Det. Beau Felton: Kay might die. I'm not gonna close my eyes and pretend that nothing bad's gonna happen. Because you know what? It already did. So you gotta tell me, what're you supposed to do when your partner dies on you?
Det. Meldrick Lewis: What you do is... You keep going.
Det. Beau Felton: What do you mean, you keep going?
Det. Meldrick Lewis: You get up, you do your job, you make it through every day... And you hope that one day you're gonna wake up and it won't hurt so much. Then the next day it will hurt a little less, and the next day, even less than that. It's not like you forget them, you know? Your life is changed forever. It's not ever gonna go back to the way it was... But you get through it... You just keep going on.
Det. Beau Felton: That's it? Keep going?
Det. Meldrick Lewis: That's it.
Det. Beau Felton: Meldrick, that's the stupidest thing I ever heard.
Det. Meldrick Lewis: You're spitting on my advice. You call me down here, I open my heart to you, and now you're spiting on what I got to say.
Det. Beau Felton: Basically, yeah.
Det. Meldrick Lewis: Gimme back the giraffe.
Det. Beau Felton: What? Forget it.
Det. Meldrick Lewis: You don't like my advice, you ain't getting the giraffe.
Det. Meldrick Lewis: What you do is... You keep going.
Det. Beau Felton: What do you mean, you keep going?
Det. Meldrick Lewis: You get up, you do your job, you make it through every day... And you hope that one day you're gonna wake up and it won't hurt so much. Then the next day it will hurt a little less, and the next day, even less than that. It's not like you forget them, you know? Your life is changed forever. It's not ever gonna go back to the way it was... But you get through it... You just keep going on.
Det. Beau Felton: That's it? Keep going?
Det. Meldrick Lewis: That's it.
Det. Beau Felton: Meldrick, that's the stupidest thing I ever heard.
Det. Meldrick Lewis: You're spitting on my advice. You call me down here, I open my heart to you, and now you're spiting on what I got to say.
Det. Beau Felton: Basically, yeah.
Det. Meldrick Lewis: Gimme back the giraffe.
Det. Beau Felton: What? Forget it.
Det. Meldrick Lewis: You don't like my advice, you ain't getting the giraffe.
Det. Frank Pembleton: You said summer was hell.
Det.Tim Bayliss: Well... it was.
Det. Frank Pembleton: It's all mind over matter, Bayliss.
Det.Tim Bayliss: No, no, it's more than mind over matter. I know my mind and my mind remembers my ass melting into the tops of my shoes, all right? Summer was hell.
Det. Frank Pembleton: There's no humidity in hell.
Det.Tim Bayliss: What, you do a field report?
Det. Frank Pembleton: By all reliable accounts, there's not a single drop of water to pass between heaven and hell. Hell is a dry heat.
Det.Tim Bayliss: Oh. Well, book me a flight.
Det.Tim Bayliss: Well... it was.
Det. Frank Pembleton: It's all mind over matter, Bayliss.
Det.Tim Bayliss: No, no, it's more than mind over matter. I know my mind and my mind remembers my ass melting into the tops of my shoes, all right? Summer was hell.
Det. Frank Pembleton: There's no humidity in hell.
Det.Tim Bayliss: What, you do a field report?
Det. Frank Pembleton: By all reliable accounts, there's not a single drop of water to pass between heaven and hell. Hell is a dry heat.
Det.Tim Bayliss: Oh. Well, book me a flight.
Det. Meldrick Lewis: I've been a cop for a long time. And drugs out there, we're never gonna win that. There's a hundred open-air drug markets in this city and fifty thousand drug fiends out there. And we are taking on human desires with lawyers, and jailhouses, and lockups, and you and I both know human desire is kicking us in the ass.
[Lewis and Kellerman drove up to Hazel, Pennsylvania to bring a female suspect back to Baltimore]
Police Officer in Hazel, Pennsylvania: You guys from Baltimore, here to pick up Rose Halligan?
Det. Meldrick Lewis: That's correct. I'm Detective Lewis, this is...
Police Officer in Hazel, Pennsylvania: Uh, you can't have her.
Det. Meldrick Lewis: What do you mean?
Police Officer in Hazel, Pennsylvania: Regulations stipulate a policewoman escorts a female prisoner.
Det. Meldrick Lewis: [gesturing to Kellerman] Meet Detective Michelle Kellerman.
Police Officer in Hazel, Pennsylvania: You're not a woman.
Det. Mike Kellerman: I used to be.
Police Officer in Hazel, Pennsylvania: You guys from Baltimore, here to pick up Rose Halligan?
Det. Meldrick Lewis: That's correct. I'm Detective Lewis, this is...
Police Officer in Hazel, Pennsylvania: Uh, you can't have her.
Det. Meldrick Lewis: What do you mean?
Police Officer in Hazel, Pennsylvania: Regulations stipulate a policewoman escorts a female prisoner.
Det. Meldrick Lewis: [gesturing to Kellerman] Meet Detective Michelle Kellerman.
Police Officer in Hazel, Pennsylvania: You're not a woman.
Det. Mike Kellerman: I used to be.
Potential Waitress: I'm not really a waitress. I write. One-acts.
Det. John Munch: Hunh, one-act plays.
Potential Waitress: Read them and we'll talk about them, okay?
Det. Meldrick Lewis: You're a writer and you had to ask me for a pen?
Potential Waitress: My life is total irony.
Det. John Munch: All in one act, huh?
Det. John Munch: Hunh, one-act plays.
Potential Waitress: Read them and we'll talk about them, okay?
Det. Meldrick Lewis: You're a writer and you had to ask me for a pen?
Potential Waitress: My life is total irony.
Det. John Munch: All in one act, huh?
Det. Frank Pembleton: I watch my weight. I watch my diet. I watch my blood pressure. Every eight hours, no matter where I am, or what I'm doing, I hafta take a little white pill. If I don't follow the rules, I die. I'm not going to treat you differently. I won't. 'Cause that's not who I am. And who I am is all I have left.
[on the engine that Detective Meldrick Lewis has bought for the car he is building]
Det. Steve Crosetti: Let me tell you, that doesn't play with me. See, when you buy a house, you don't buy a pile of dirt with a toilet on top. You get four walls which constitute a dwelling. You, if you look closely, have squat here.
Det. Steve Crosetti: Let me tell you, that doesn't play with me. See, when you buy a house, you don't buy a pile of dirt with a toilet on top. You get four walls which constitute a dwelling. You, if you look closely, have squat here.
Det. Stan Bolander: How come every time I open that refrigerator, there's one drop of milk left in the carton? So who has to go to the 7-11 and replace the carton of milk?
Det. John Munch: Me.
Det. Stan Bolander: That's besides the point. He's doing that on my behalf. He could be doing something else for me.
Det. John Munch: Me.
Det. Stan Bolander: That's besides the point. He's doing that on my behalf. He could be doing something else for me.
