A League of Their Own Quotes
Two sisters join the first female professional baseball league and struggle to help it succeed amidst their own growing rivalry.
Jimmy Dugan: Evelyn, could you come here, you got a second? Which team do you play for?
Evelyn Gardner: Well, I'm a Peach.
Jimmy Dugan: Well I was just wonderin' why you would throw home when we got a two-run lead. You let the tying run get on second base and we lost the lead because of you. Start using your head. That's the lump that's three feet above your ass.
[Evelyn starts to cry]
Jimmy Dugan: Are you crying? Are you crying? ARE YOU CRYING? There's no crying! THERE'S NO CRYING IN BASEBALL!
Doris Murphy: Why don't you give her a break, Jimmy...
Jimmy Dugan: Oh, you zip it, Doris! Rogers Hornsby was my manager, and he called me a talking pile of pigshit. And that was when my parents drove all the way down from Michigan to see me play the game. And did I cry?
Evelyn Gardner: No, no, no.
Jimmy Dugan: Yeah! NO. And do you know why?
Evelyn Gardner: No...
Jimmy Dugan: Because there's no crying in baseball. THERE'S NO CRYING IN BASEBALL! No crying!
Evelyn Gardner: Well, I'm a Peach.
Jimmy Dugan: Well I was just wonderin' why you would throw home when we got a two-run lead. You let the tying run get on second base and we lost the lead because of you. Start using your head. That's the lump that's three feet above your ass.
[Evelyn starts to cry]
Jimmy Dugan: Are you crying? Are you crying? ARE YOU CRYING? There's no crying! THERE'S NO CRYING IN BASEBALL!
Doris Murphy: Why don't you give her a break, Jimmy...
Jimmy Dugan: Oh, you zip it, Doris! Rogers Hornsby was my manager, and he called me a talking pile of pigshit. And that was when my parents drove all the way down from Michigan to see me play the game. And did I cry?
Evelyn Gardner: No, no, no.
Jimmy Dugan: Yeah! NO. And do you know why?
Evelyn Gardner: No...
Jimmy Dugan: Because there's no crying in baseball. THERE'S NO CRYING IN BASEBALL! No crying!
Jimmy Dugan: Taking a little day trip?
Dottie Hinson: No, Bob and I are driving home. To Oregon.
Jimmy Dugan: [long pause] You know, I really thought you were a ballplayer.
Dottie Hinson: Well, you were wrong.
Jimmy Dugan: Was I?
Dottie Hinson: Yeah. It is only a game, Jimmy. It's only a game, and, and, I don't need this. I have Bob; I don't need this. At all.
Jimmy Dugan: I, I gave away five years at the end my career, drinking. Five years. And now there isn't anything I wouldn't give to get back any one day of it.
Dottie Hinson: Well, we're different.
Jimmy Dugan: This is chickenshit, Dottie, if you want to go back to Oregon and make a hundred babies, great, I'm in no position to tell anyone how to live. But sneaking out like this, quitting, you'll regret it for the rest of your life. Baseball is what gets inside you. It's what lights you up, you can't deny that.
Dottie Hinson: It just got too hard.
Jimmy Dugan: It's supposed to be hard. If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. The hard... is what makes it great.
Dottie Hinson: No, Bob and I are driving home. To Oregon.
Jimmy Dugan: [long pause] You know, I really thought you were a ballplayer.
Dottie Hinson: Well, you were wrong.
Jimmy Dugan: Was I?
Dottie Hinson: Yeah. It is only a game, Jimmy. It's only a game, and, and, I don't need this. I have Bob; I don't need this. At all.
Jimmy Dugan: I, I gave away five years at the end my career, drinking. Five years. And now there isn't anything I wouldn't give to get back any one day of it.
Dottie Hinson: Well, we're different.
Jimmy Dugan: This is chickenshit, Dottie, if you want to go back to Oregon and make a hundred babies, great, I'm in no position to tell anyone how to live. But sneaking out like this, quitting, you'll regret it for the rest of your life. Baseball is what gets inside you. It's what lights you up, you can't deny that.
Dottie Hinson: It just got too hard.
Jimmy Dugan: It's supposed to be hard. If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. The hard... is what makes it great.
Rockford Peaches: Batter up, hear that call. The time has come for one and all... to play ball. We're the members of the All American League. We come from cities near and far. We've got Canadians, Irish ones, & Swedes. We're all for one, we're one for all, we're all American. Each girl stands, her head so proudly high. Her motto "Do or Die". She's not the one to use or need an alibi. Our chaperones are not too soft; they're not too tough. Our managers are on the ball. We've got a President who really knows his stuff. We're all for one, we're one for all, we're all American.
[Ernie sees Dottie and Kit vigorously milking cows]
Ernie Capadino: Ow. Doesn't that hurt them?
Dottie Hinson: Doesn't seem to.
Ernie Capadino: Well, that would bruise the hell out of me.
Dottie Hinson: Who ARE you?
Ernie Capadino: I'm Ernie Capadino. I'm a baseball scout. I saw you playing today. Not bad, not bad. You ever heard of Walter Harvey, makes Harvey bars - you know, the candy?
Dottie Hinson: Yeah. We feed them to the cows when they're constipated.
Ernie Capadino: That's the guy. He's starting a girls' baseball league, so he can make a buck while the boys are overseas. Wanna play?
Dottie Hinson: Huh?
Ernie Capadino: Nice retort. Tryouts are in Chicago. It's a real league, professional.
Kit Keller: Professional - baseball?
Ernie Capadino: Mmm-hmm. They'll pay you 75 dollars a week.
Kit Keller: We only make 30 at the dairy.
Ernie Capadino: Well then, this would be more, wouldn't it?
Ernie Capadino: Ow. Doesn't that hurt them?
Dottie Hinson: Doesn't seem to.
Ernie Capadino: Well, that would bruise the hell out of me.
Dottie Hinson: Who ARE you?
Ernie Capadino: I'm Ernie Capadino. I'm a baseball scout. I saw you playing today. Not bad, not bad. You ever heard of Walter Harvey, makes Harvey bars - you know, the candy?
Dottie Hinson: Yeah. We feed them to the cows when they're constipated.
Ernie Capadino: That's the guy. He's starting a girls' baseball league, so he can make a buck while the boys are overseas. Wanna play?
Dottie Hinson: Huh?
Ernie Capadino: Nice retort. Tryouts are in Chicago. It's a real league, professional.
Kit Keller: Professional - baseball?
Ernie Capadino: Mmm-hmm. They'll pay you 75 dollars a week.
Kit Keller: We only make 30 at the dairy.
Ernie Capadino: Well then, this would be more, wouldn't it?
Older Stilwell: Hi, Dottie. You remember? "You're gonna lose!"
Older Dottie: Stillwell, angel! My goodness! Where's your mom?
Older Stilwell: Mom died... a few years ago.
Older Dottie: Oh, I'm sorry. She was a real nice lady, and a damn fine ball player.
Older Stilwell: Yeah. When I heard about this, I... I felt I owed it to her to be here. She always said it was the best time she ever had in her entire life.
Older Dottie: Stillwell, angel! My goodness! Where's your mom?
Older Stilwell: Mom died... a few years ago.
Older Dottie: Oh, I'm sorry. She was a real nice lady, and a damn fine ball player.
Older Stilwell: Yeah. When I heard about this, I... I felt I owed it to her to be here. She always said it was the best time she ever had in her entire life.
Mae Mordabito: [at Tryouts] Ya know they got over a hundred girls here. So some of yous are going home.
Kit Keller: What do you mean some of us?
[Doris throws a fast ball at Kit, which Dottie catches with her bare hands]
Mae Mordabito: OK, some of them are going home.
Doris Murphy: Hey, how'd you do that?
Kit Keller: What do you mean some of us?
[Doris throws a fast ball at Kit, which Dottie catches with her bare hands]
Mae Mordabito: OK, some of them are going home.
Doris Murphy: Hey, how'd you do that?
Ira Lowenstein: Until you did that, I couldn't tell if you were... drunk or dead.
Jimmy Dugan: It was made very clear to me what I'm supposed to do here. I smile, wave my little hat... I did that, so when do I get paid?
Ira Lowenstein: Now, Jimmy, you have some pretty good ballplayers here. You ought to give them a little bit of your...
Jimmy Dugan: [interrupting] Ballplayers. I don't have ballplayers, I've got girls. Girls are what you sleep with after the game, not, not what you coach during the game.
[spits]
Ira Lowenstein: If we paid you a little bit more, Jimmy, do you think you could be just a little more disgusting?
Jimmy Dugan: [brightly] Well, I could certainly use the money.
Jimmy Dugan: It was made very clear to me what I'm supposed to do here. I smile, wave my little hat... I did that, so when do I get paid?
Ira Lowenstein: Now, Jimmy, you have some pretty good ballplayers here. You ought to give them a little bit of your...
Jimmy Dugan: [interrupting] Ballplayers. I don't have ballplayers, I've got girls. Girls are what you sleep with after the game, not, not what you coach during the game.
[spits]
Ira Lowenstein: If we paid you a little bit more, Jimmy, do you think you could be just a little more disgusting?
Jimmy Dugan: [brightly] Well, I could certainly use the money.
Doris Murphy: Hey Mae, Mae, your date's here.
Mae Mordabito: How do I look?
Doris Murphy: Where'd you get that dress?
Mae Mordabito: Borrowed it.
Doris Murphy: It don't fit you, Mae, it's too tight.
Mae Mordabito: I don't plan on wearing it that long.
Doris Murphy: Ohh. I don't know why you get dressed at all.
Mae Mordabito: How do I look?
Doris Murphy: Where'd you get that dress?
Mae Mordabito: Borrowed it.
Doris Murphy: It don't fit you, Mae, it's too tight.
Mae Mordabito: I don't plan on wearing it that long.
Doris Murphy: Ohh. I don't know why you get dressed at all.
Western Union man: Excuse Me! Excuse Me! I have a telegram for one of you ladies from the War Department. Let's see here... boy, I hate these, these are the worst! The least the Army could do is send someone personally, to tell you your husband is dead. Darn, I had the name right here! Well I gotta go back and get this straightened out.
Jimmy Dugan: Wait, just give me the telegram.
Western Union man: I can't. I don't have a name on the checklist.
Jimmy Dugan: Just give me the telegram
Western Union man: [Jimmy grabs it and pushes the Western Union man out of the dressing room door] Hey, this is official. This is from the War Department! C'mon, that's official business! I'm coming back!
Jimmy Dugan: [Jimmy reads the telegram and begins walking down the line of players]
[the camera drops on Betty]
Jimmy Dugan: I'm sorry Betty.
Betty 'Betty Spaghetti' Horn: [Crying hysterically] No! George!
Jimmy Dugan: Wait, just give me the telegram.
Western Union man: I can't. I don't have a name on the checklist.
Jimmy Dugan: Just give me the telegram
Western Union man: [Jimmy grabs it and pushes the Western Union man out of the dressing room door] Hey, this is official. This is from the War Department! C'mon, that's official business! I'm coming back!
Jimmy Dugan: [Jimmy reads the telegram and begins walking down the line of players]
[the camera drops on Betty]
Jimmy Dugan: I'm sorry Betty.
Betty 'Betty Spaghetti' Horn: [Crying hysterically] No! George!
Maida Gillespie: Careers and higher education are leading to the masculinization of women, with enormously dangerous consequences to the home, the children, and our country. When our boys come home from war, what kind of girls will they be coming home to? And now the most disgusting example of this sexual confusion: Mr. Walter Harvey of Harvey bars is presenting us with women's baseball. Right here in Chicago, young girls plucked from their families are gathered at Harvey Field, to see which one of them can be the most masculine. Mr. Harvey, like your candy bars, you're completely... nuts.
Dottie Hinson: Hey, hey, hey, you guys, come on! How hard can it be to make a lineup? Come on!
Doris Murphy: Oh yeah? Well, why don't you do it, Oregon?
Dottie Hinson: Me?
Mae Mordabito, Doris Murphy: [Together] Yeah, you!
Dottie Hinson: Alright, Mae, center field, lead off.
Mae Mordabito: She's good!
Doris Murphy: Oh yeah? Well, why don't you do it, Oregon?
Dottie Hinson: Me?
Mae Mordabito, Doris Murphy: [Together] Yeah, you!
Dottie Hinson: Alright, Mae, center field, lead off.
Mae Mordabito: She's good!
Jimmy Dugan: All right, everyone, let's listen up now, listen up. Hey! I don't know what that kid is doing, but get him away from the tape! Stilwell Something important has just happened. I was in the toilet reading my contract, and it turns out, I get a bonus when we get to the World Series. So, let's play hard, let's play smart, use your heads.
Doris Murphy: [quoting him] That's that lump three feet above our ass, right, Jimmy?
[laughter]
Doris Murphy: [quoting him] That's that lump three feet above our ass, right, Jimmy?
[laughter]
Walter Harvey: You kind of let me down on that San Antonio job.
Jimmy Dugan: I, uh, yeh, I, uh... I freely admit, sir, I had no right to... sell off the team's equipment like that; that won't happen again.
Walter Harvey: Let me be blunt. Are you still a fall-down drunk?
Jimmy Dugan: Well, that is blunt. Ahem. No sir, I've, uh, quit drinking.
Walter Harvey: You've seen the error of your ways.
Jimmy Dugan: No, I just can't afford it.
[giggles]
Walter Harvey: It's funny to you. Your drinking is funny. You're a young man, Jimmy: you still could be playing, if you just would've laid off the booze.
Jimmy Dugan: Well, it's not exactly like that... I hurt my knee.
Walter Harvey: You fell out of a hotel. That's how you hurt it.
Jimmy Dugan: Well, there was a fire.
Walter Harvey: Which you started, which I had to pay for.
Jimmy Dugan: Well, now, I was going to send you a thank-you card, Mr. Harvey, but I wasn't allowed anything sharp to write with.
Jimmy Dugan: I, uh, yeh, I, uh... I freely admit, sir, I had no right to... sell off the team's equipment like that; that won't happen again.
Walter Harvey: Let me be blunt. Are you still a fall-down drunk?
Jimmy Dugan: Well, that is blunt. Ahem. No sir, I've, uh, quit drinking.
Walter Harvey: You've seen the error of your ways.
Jimmy Dugan: No, I just can't afford it.
[giggles]
Walter Harvey: It's funny to you. Your drinking is funny. You're a young man, Jimmy: you still could be playing, if you just would've laid off the booze.
Jimmy Dugan: Well, it's not exactly like that... I hurt my knee.
Walter Harvey: You fell out of a hotel. That's how you hurt it.
Jimmy Dugan: Well, there was a fire.
Walter Harvey: Which you started, which I had to pay for.
Jimmy Dugan: Well, now, I was going to send you a thank-you card, Mr. Harvey, but I wasn't allowed anything sharp to write with.
Helen Haley: [the girls are checking the team lists] Hi. Can you read, honey?
Shirley Baker: [crying] No.
Helen Haley: All right... what's your name?
Shirley Baker: Shirley Baker.
Helen Haley: Shirley Baker... Shirley Baker... okay, let's take a look.
[scans the lists]
Helen Haley: This is you! You're with us! You're a Rockford Peach!
Charlie Collins, Racine Coach: Go join your team.
Shirley Baker: [crying] No.
Helen Haley: All right... what's your name?
Shirley Baker: Shirley Baker.
Helen Haley: Shirley Baker... Shirley Baker... okay, let's take a look.
[scans the lists]
Helen Haley: This is you! You're with us! You're a Rockford Peach!
Charlie Collins, Racine Coach: Go join your team.
Mae Mordabito: [Mae helps Shirley learn to read] Sound it out...
Shirley Baker: Kimm...
Mae Mordabito: Kimono.
Shirley Baker: Kimono, kimono. Off. And. Gr - Gra - Grabb"d.
Mae Mordabito: Grabbed.
Shirley Baker: Her. M - mi - mil - mil - milky, milky. White, white. Milky white.
Evelyn Gardner: Mae. What are you giving her to read?
Mae Mordabito: Oh, what the difference does it make? She's reading, okay? That's the important thing. Now go away, go, shoo, shoo. Go ahead, Shirley, you're doing good.
Shirley Baker: Thanks, Mae. Milky white bre - breasts.
[Gives Mae a surprised look]
Mae Mordabito: It gets really good after that. Look. The delivery boy walks in...
Shirley Baker: Kimm...
Mae Mordabito: Kimono.
Shirley Baker: Kimono, kimono. Off. And. Gr - Gra - Grabb"d.
Mae Mordabito: Grabbed.
Shirley Baker: Her. M - mi - mil - mil - milky, milky. White, white. Milky white.
Evelyn Gardner: Mae. What are you giving her to read?
Mae Mordabito: Oh, what the difference does it make? She's reading, okay? That's the important thing. Now go away, go, shoo, shoo. Go ahead, Shirley, you're doing good.
Shirley Baker: Thanks, Mae. Milky white bre - breasts.
[Gives Mae a surprised look]
Mae Mordabito: It gets really good after that. Look. The delivery boy walks in...
Jimmy Dugan: Uh, Lord, hallowed be Thy name. May our feet be swift; may our bats be mighty; may our balls... be plentiful. Lord, I'd just like to thank You for that waitress in South Bend. You know who she is - she kept calling Your name. And God, these are good girls, and they work hard. Just help them see it all the way through. Okay, that's it.
Ira Lowenstein: This is what it's going to be like in the factories, too, I suppose, isn't it? "The men are back, Rosie, turn in your rivets." We told them it was their patriotic duty to get out of the kitchen and go to work; and now, when the men come back, we'll send them back to the kitchen.
Walter Harvey: What should we do - send the boys returning from WAR back to the kitchen?
Walter Harvey: What should we do - send the boys returning from WAR back to the kitchen?
Older Doris: [Doris sees Dottie watching the former team playing after 40s years] Mae! Come here! Is that her?
Older Mae: I don't know, is it?
Older Doris: Dottie?
Older Doris, Older Mae: [Doris throw a fast ball and Dottie catches it like their first day in tryouts] It's her!
Older Dottie: [smiling in recognition] Hey Doris
Older Mae: I don't know, is it?
Older Doris: Dottie?
Older Doris, Older Mae: [Doris throw a fast ball and Dottie catches it like their first day in tryouts] It's her!
Older Dottie: [smiling in recognition] Hey Doris
Kit Keller: [while the team is stranded out on the road] Dottie, you going to come with us?
Dottie Hinson: Where are you going?
Mae Mordabito: A road house called the Sud's Bucket.
Dottie Hinson: Ah, no. You know, I'm married...
Doris Murphy: C'mon Dottie, you ain't on the farm any more, live a little bit!
Miss Cuthbert: Girls, girls, please! Mr. Goosatelli shan't be returning.
[Goes back on the bus]
Dottie Hinson: Hey, what are you going to do about Ms. Cuthbert? How are you going to get past her?
Kit Keller: Mae's going to poison her dinner.
Dottie Hinson: WHAT?
[Girls laugh]
Dottie Hinson: Where are you going?
Mae Mordabito: A road house called the Sud's Bucket.
Dottie Hinson: Ah, no. You know, I'm married...
Doris Murphy: C'mon Dottie, you ain't on the farm any more, live a little bit!
Miss Cuthbert: Girls, girls, please! Mr. Goosatelli shan't be returning.
[Goes back on the bus]
Dottie Hinson: Hey, what are you going to do about Ms. Cuthbert? How are you going to get past her?
Kit Keller: Mae's going to poison her dinner.
Dottie Hinson: WHAT?
[Girls laugh]
Stadium announcer: Now batting for the Peaches, #5, center fielder, Mae Mordabito.
Racine Catcher: C'mon, no hitter, no hitter!
Stadium announcer: Here's the pitch...
[Mae swings and hits a ball into right center field]
Stadium announcer: ... there's a shot into right center it's... up the alley!
Peaches first base coach: Go to third, go to third, keep goin', Mae!
Ellen Sue Gotlander - Shortstop: Keep goin', Mae, all the way!
Stadium announcer: She's turning 'round first, she's heading up to third. Mordabito's heading past second!
Racine Catcher: Go to third, go to third!
Stadium announcer: She's headed into third!
Dottie Hinson: Dirt in the skirt, Mae! Dirt in the skirt!
Umpire: [Mae slides head-first into third base, ahead of the throw] Safe!
Stadium announcer: She's in there with a triple!
Mae Mordabito: Time.
Umpire: Boy, did she smack that one on the kisser. No wonder they call her "All the Way" Mae.
Racine Catcher: C'mon, no hitter, no hitter!
Stadium announcer: Here's the pitch...
[Mae swings and hits a ball into right center field]
Stadium announcer: ... there's a shot into right center it's... up the alley!
Peaches first base coach: Go to third, go to third, keep goin', Mae!
Ellen Sue Gotlander - Shortstop: Keep goin', Mae, all the way!
Stadium announcer: She's turning 'round first, she's heading up to third. Mordabito's heading past second!
Racine Catcher: Go to third, go to third!
Stadium announcer: She's headed into third!
Dottie Hinson: Dirt in the skirt, Mae! Dirt in the skirt!
Umpire: [Mae slides head-first into third base, ahead of the throw] Safe!
Stadium announcer: She's in there with a triple!
Mae Mordabito: Time.
Umpire: Boy, did she smack that one on the kisser. No wonder they call her "All the Way" Mae.
Radio Sportscaster: This week, on "The World of sports": When the boys are overseas, and off to war, baseball pitches in for the war effort. Trading bats for bullets, Yankees star Joe DiMaggio promises to give those Nazis a jolt. Ace fire baller, Bob Feller, has traded Cleveland gray for navy blue. Baseball biggest stars say: Look out Mr. Hitler, the Yanks are coming, not to mention the Indians, Red Sox, and Tigers.
Announcer: After the first month of league play, the shine still isn't off these "diamond" gals. Alice "Skeeter" Gaspers says legging out a triple is no reason to let your nose get shiny - Betty Grable has nothing on these gals. Helen Haley has not only been a member of several championship amateur teams, she is also an accomplished coffee maker.
