After enslavement & near extermination by an alien race in the year 3000, humanity begins to fight back.

Terl: While you were still learning how to spell your name, I was being trained to conquer galaxies!
Zete: Home office is well aware of your academic achievements and obvious talents. That's why we decided not to keep you here for another 5 cycles
Ker: It's a joke!
Terl: Oh, thank you sir. I don't know if I could have kept my sanity being here for another 5 cycles
Zete: We've decided to keep you here for another 50 cycles. With endless options for renewal.
Zete: [echoes]
Zete: [laughs maniacally]
Chirk: I am going to make you as happy as a baby Psychlo on a straight diet of kerbango.
Terl: Do you WANT lunch?
[looking at an overhead photo of a car]
Zete: What is this species?
Terl: Well, according to the Clinko historians, the species is called "dog."
Zete: Dog?
Terl: Yes.
Zete: Obviously the superior race, having the man-animal chauffeur it around.
Terl: Crap-lousy ceiling! I thought I told to get some man-animals in here and fix it.
Terl: Ker, I'd like you to meet Chirk.
[Ker grunts appreciatively]
Terl: She's, um... she's, um...
Chirk: His soon-to-be newly acquired secretary.
Terl: Yes.
Ker: [eagerly] Really?
Terl: [quietly, to Ker] She's stupid enough not to be a menace, good-looking enough to be decorative; she gets drunk with economical speed...
Terl: [normal voice]
[Chirk extends her very long tongue]
Ker: Ooh. I can see that.
Terl: You are out of your skull bone if you think that I am going to write on the report "shot by man-animal" as the cause of the death unless I see it!
Terl: Attention. This is Terl, your chief of security. Exterminate all man-animals at will, and happy hunting!
Terl: It is a pleasure to see you, your excellency, and I would be honored to expedite your clearance through security.
Zete: Please, call me Zete. Does all of Earth look like this?
Terl: Oh, I'm afraid so, sir.
Zete: Pathetic. All the green and the blue sky. They told me this planet was ugly, but this has got to be one of the ugliest crap holes in the entire universe.
Terl: I couldn't agree with you more.
Zete: I hate these puny undersized planets. The gravity is so... different.
Terl: Well, one does get used to it.
Zete: And the human animals, grossly undersized.
Ker: They don't make very good eating, your excellency.
Terl: Stupid humans.
Jonnie Goodboy Tyler: Has anyone here ever seen one? A monster? A demon? A BEAST? YAH!
Chrissy: What if he's not dead?
Parson Staffer: Hope is an admirable quality, but foolish isn't.
Chrissy: Your mother gave it to me before she died.
Terl: I hate these things I feel like... like it's a test that I'm not prepared for! Why, Hell it could even be...
[takes out severed head and shows it to Ker]
Terl: Our friendly bartender
Terl: You... Hungry, little fella? Want some rat? It's good!
Terl: [Speaks Psychlo, Translated to English] Do you under... understand? Understand me?

If you find QuotesGram website useful to you, please donate $10 to support the ongoing development work.