Steve Martin and Bonnie Hunt return as heads of the Baker family who, while on vacation, find themselves in competition with a rival family of eight children, headed by Eugene Levy.

Tom Baker: What do you do for a living Eliot?
Eliot: Well... I'm in 8th grade.
Nora Baker-McNulty: You just pissed off a severely hormonal pregnant woman!
Sarah Baker: Dad, we're gonna need a forklift for Lorraine's luggage.
Lorraine Baker: What? I've only been here 30 seconds and you're already making fun of me.
Sarah Baker: Yeah, that was my foot.
Sarah Baker: Is this whole suitcase just for makeup?
Lorraine Baker: Whatever, butch.
Tom Baker: Tire swing ready!
[falls off tire swing]
Tom Baker: Tire swing, not ready!
Eliot: [during he looks at Sarah] She is sooo cool!
Nora Baker-McNulty: You get Lorraine and ill pee in the back
Lorraine Baker: [after Sarah asks Lorraine for some make-up help] Now, let's start with some lip gloss.
[Lorraine unleashes the lipgloss]
Sarah Baker: PINK? Can't we put on like a skin color?
Lorraine Baker: Hold still.
Charlie Baker: You wanna go for a walk or something?
Anne Murtaugh: Is Charlie Baker asking me out on a date?
Charlie Baker: [unsure about it, because both dads are enemies] I'm not sure if our fathers would approve, but...
Anne Murtaugh: [quietly] Let's go.
Nigel Baker: Winnetka? That's my middle name.
Kyle Baker: And Lake is mine.
Tom Baker: That's because you were conceived there.
Nigel Baker: What's that mean?
Jessica Baker: It means mom and dad had...
Kate 'Mom' Baker: ...a conversation, that we would discuss it much later when everybody could understand!
Kate 'Mom' Baker: She couldn't even come to me and tell me she wanted to wear make up!
[from trailer]
Tom Baker: That's not gonna fit in your tent, Lorraine.
Lorraine Baker: Oh, I'm gonna make it fit, Dad!
[from trailer]
Kate 'Mom' Baker: Honey you actually bought that shirt?
Tom Baker: Hey every dad is entitled to one hideous shirt, and one horrible sweater. It's part of the dad code.
Lorraine Baker: Still smells the same. Old gross stuff, dead animals, and murky lake water.
Tom Baker: It's called fresh air sweetie.
Mark Baker: Hello. Nature boy here, remember?
Sarah Baker: Dad, we're gonna need a forklift for Lorraine's luggage.
Jimmy Murtaugh: Nice hands.
Lorraine Baker: You know how I feel about camping.
Tom Baker: But, we're staying in a house.
Lorraine Baker: A house with no air conditioning. That makes it camping.
Tom Baker: [to his newborn grandson] Tom. Hey, Tom. Welcome to family.
[Sarah knocks Mike off his skateboard]
Mike Baker: SARAH!