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Video game adventuress Lara Croft comes to life in a movie where she races against time and villains to recover powerful ancient artifacts.
Lara Croft: To see your world in a grain of sand, and a heaven in a wild flower. Hold infinity in the palm of your hand, An eternity in an hour. William Blake.
[Lara sees the UPS man staring at the dilapidated house] Lara Croft: I woke up this morning and I just hated everything.
[Hilary meets Lara outside the shower with something other than a t-shirt] Lara Croft: Oh... very funny. Hilary: I'm only trying to turn you into a lady. Lara Croft: Mm... [walks past him and drops the towel she was wearing] Hilary: [sighs] And a lady should be modest. Lara Croft: Yes, a *lady* should be modest.
Bryce: So, time to save the universe again then, is it? Lara Croft: Absolutely
Manfred Powell: Lady Croft, tell me, is there a good reason why I just kept you alive? Lara Croft: Yes. That is not the true eye. Manfred Powell: This is the true eye. Lara Croft: It's not, actually. It's a mirror image. Manfred Powell: Ms. Croft, I think you're trying to cheat me out of my little ray of sunshine. Lara Croft: Why would I try and cheat you out of anything, now, I need you to get the piece so I can steal it from you later. Manfred Powell: You're bluffing! Julius, make a mental note, kill Ms. Croft if she attempts any such thing. Julius: Yes, sir. Lara Croft: Well we can do it my way, or we can all come back in time for the next allignment and you're welcome to try and kill me then, in oh, say, another 5,000 years?
[last lines] [Lara Croft enters dressed "properly" to see Hilary and Bryce standing and grinning] Lara Croft: What? [Bryce takes a picture of her] Lara Croft: [the revamped training robot enters the room] Lara Croft: Hmm. [Hilary takes the covering off the serving tray to reveal Lara Croft's trademark guns, and smiles] Lara Croft: [Lara Croft grabs the guns and film ends with a freeze-frame]
Alex West: Lara Croft, I don't believe it. Still pretending to be a photojournalist? Ya know, I think it's really cool that you can still keep a day job, though it's obviously just for show. Lara Croft: So, Alex, still pretending to be an archaeologist? Alex West: Lara, do we always have to fight like this? Maybe we don't. Lara Croft: Hmm, maybe we do. Alex West: Why? Lara Croft: You stole my prayer wheels! Alex West: Stole? Stole? Coming from you? It's not like you ever really owned them or anything. Hey, you're the tomb raider... Lara Croft: Oh look, I think your clients need you. As you once said, so memorably, "It's all just a business". So go, go do business.
Lara Croft: Was it programmed to stop before it took my head off? Bryce: Ah well... that would be a... no.
Manfred Powell: Into the belly of the beast. Alex West: And out of the demon's ass.
Bryce: What's that smell? Lara Croft: Five AM
Lara Croft: But you might try to kill me. Manfred Powell: I'm not going to kill you. Lara Croft: I said you'd try.
[Alex West turns around to find Lara Croft sitting] Lara Croft: Hello, Alex. Alex West: I suppose you think I'm a greedy, unscrupulous sell-out who'll do just about anything for money? Lara Croft: Yes. That's right. Alex West: [shrugs] Well, the money bit's true I guess. Lara Croft: Is it, Alex? If you cross me, we may not be able to remain friends. [Looks him up and down] Lara Croft: Always a pleasure. Alex West: Now for a *cold* shower...
Lara Croft: It's a clock... It's ticking. Bryce: Oh... one of those ticking clocks, eh?
Bryce: [taking screws out of clock to open it] ... screw 13 to quadrant 3, screw 14 to quadrant 4... Hilary: [sighs and rolls eyes] Please. Bryce: It's my system! So I know where they all came from! Lara Croft: It's camouflage. [takes hammer and smashes the clock to pieces] Bryce: [wincing] Okay.
Distinguished Gentleman: If we don't get that piece then we'll have to wait five thousand years for another alignment. Manfred Powell: I don't know about you but I'm not planning to give that much time to this enterprise.
Bryce: Me bum's gone to sleep again, all down the left cheek. Lara Croft: Really? That's fascinating.
Lara Croft: We have 83 rooms. Why can't you live in the house? Bryce: Well, I'm a free spirit, me.
[first lines] [after an extended action sequence with a training robot which then attempts to revive itself and sneak up on her] Lara Croft: Stop!
Lara Croft: [after reading the ancient writing in the tomb] Right, so... Pretty much touch anything, and you get your head chopped off.
Lara Croft: But time was stolen from us and it's not fair. Lord Richard Croft: No, it's not fair.
Bryce: Lara, it's a clock, it ticks, it tells the time. [looks at his watch] Bryce: It's wrong.
Bryce: My ignorance amuses me... My ignorance amuses me? Lara Croft: Yes well I've always found your ignorance quite amusing.