Midnight Run Quotes
An accountant is chased by bounty hunters, the FBI, and the Mafia after jumping bail.
Jack Walsh: I know my rights. You owe me phone calls.
Alonzo Mosely: What should be of paramount importance to you right now is not the phone calls, it's the fact that you're gonna spend ten years for impersonating a federal agent.
Jack Walsh: 10 years for impersonating a fed, uh?
Alonzo Mosely: 10 years.
Jack Walsh: How comes no one's after you?
Alonzo Mosely: What should be of paramount importance to you right now is not the phone calls, it's the fact that you're gonna spend ten years for impersonating a federal agent.
Jack Walsh: 10 years for impersonating a fed, uh?
Alonzo Mosely: 10 years.
Jack Walsh: How comes no one's after you?
Jack Walsh: Where am I? I'm in Boise, Idaho; no, no, no, wait a minute: I'm in Anchorage, Alaska. No, no, wait: I'm in Casper, Wyoming; I'm in the lobby of a Howard Johnson's and I'm wearing a pink carnation.
Eddie Moscone: What the fuck are you talking about?
Jack Walsh: I am not talking to you, I am talking to the other guys.
Eddie Moscone: What other guys?
Jack Walsh: Well, let me describe the scene to you: There are these guys, see? They've probably been up for like two days; they stink of B.O.; they have coffee breath; they're constipated from sittin' on their asses for so long; they're sitting in a van, and they're probably parked right up the street from your office Eddie, YOUR PHONE IS TAPPED!
Eddie Moscone: What the fuck are you talking about?
Jack Walsh: I am not talking to you, I am talking to the other guys.
Eddie Moscone: What other guys?
Jack Walsh: Well, let me describe the scene to you: There are these guys, see? They've probably been up for like two days; they stink of B.O.; they have coffee breath; they're constipated from sittin' on their asses for so long; they're sitting in a van, and they're probably parked right up the street from your office Eddie, YOUR PHONE IS TAPPED!
[last lines]
Jack Walsh: [Jack hails cab. When it pulls over he knocks on passenger side front window and driver rolls it down]
[Pointing at driver]
Jack Walsh: You wouldn't have change for a thousand, would ya?
Cab Driver: Whatta ya, a comedian? Get outta here, you bum!
[Cab driver drives away]
Jack Walsh: [Zips up coat and turns up collar] Looks like I'm walkin'.
Jack Walsh: [Jack hails cab. When it pulls over he knocks on passenger side front window and driver rolls it down]
[Pointing at driver]
Jack Walsh: You wouldn't have change for a thousand, would ya?
Cab Driver: Whatta ya, a comedian? Get outta here, you bum!
[Cab driver drives away]
Jack Walsh: [Zips up coat and turns up collar] Looks like I'm walkin'.
Eddie Moscone: What happened to the goddamn plane?
Jack Walsh: [Uneasy] He doesn't like to fly.
Eddie Moscone: He doesn't like to fly? What the fuck does that mean? Listen to me, Jack. You've gotta be here in less than two and a half fuckin' days! A half a million dollars of my money... WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON THERE?
Jack Walsh: Eddie, Eddie, I swear to God, don't start with me or so help me, I will shoot him and dump him in a fuckin' swamp!
[Mardukas looks frightened but Jack shakes his head at him as in "not really"]
Jack Walsh: [Uneasy] He doesn't like to fly.
Eddie Moscone: He doesn't like to fly? What the fuck does that mean? Listen to me, Jack. You've gotta be here in less than two and a half fuckin' days! A half a million dollars of my money... WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON THERE?
Jack Walsh: Eddie, Eddie, I swear to God, don't start with me or so help me, I will shoot him and dump him in a fuckin' swamp!
[Mardukas looks frightened but Jack shakes his head at him as in "not really"]
Jack Walsh: I can't keep you cuffed on a commercial flight, and I gotta check my gun with my luggage, but you fuck with me once and I'm gonna break your neck.
Jonathan Mardukas: I can't fly.
Jack Walsh: What?
Jonathan Mardukas: You heard me, I can't fly.
Jack Walsh: No, no, no. You're going to have to do better than that, pal.
Jonathan Mardukas: No, I don't have to do better than that, because it's the truth, I can't fly: I suffer from aviaphobia.
Jack Walsh: What does that mean?
Jonathan Mardukas: It means I can't fly. I also suffer from acrophobia and claustrophobia.
Jack Walsh: I'll tell you what: if you don't cooperate, you're gonna suffer from "fistophobia".
Jonathan Mardukas: I can't fly.
Jack Walsh: What?
Jonathan Mardukas: You heard me, I can't fly.
Jack Walsh: No, no, no. You're going to have to do better than that, pal.
Jonathan Mardukas: No, I don't have to do better than that, because it's the truth, I can't fly: I suffer from aviaphobia.
Jack Walsh: What does that mean?
Jonathan Mardukas: It means I can't fly. I also suffer from acrophobia and claustrophobia.
Jack Walsh: I'll tell you what: if you don't cooperate, you're gonna suffer from "fistophobia".
Jonathan Mardukas: You lied to me first!
Jack Walsh: What the - -YOU LIED TO ME FIRST!
Jonathan Mardukas: Yes! Yes. But you didn't know I was lying to you when you lied to me down by the river. So as far as you knew, you lied to me first!
Jack Walsh: How can I argue with this guy. I don't know what the fuck he's talking about.
Jack Walsh: What the - -YOU LIED TO ME FIRST!
Jonathan Mardukas: Yes! Yes. But you didn't know I was lying to you when you lied to me down by the river. So as far as you knew, you lied to me first!
Jack Walsh: How can I argue with this guy. I don't know what the fuck he's talking about.
Jonathan Mardukas: [impersonating an FBI agent] Would you describe exactly what the last man who passed a $20 bill to you looked like?
Bar Cashier: Thirty, tall...
Jonathan Mardukas: About 6 feet?
Bar Cashier: [shakes head] Six-five.
Jonathan Mardukas: Dark hair?
Bar Cashier: Light colored.
Jonathan Mardukas: [looks at Jack] Sounds like our man.
Bar Cashier: Thirty, tall...
Jonathan Mardukas: About 6 feet?
Bar Cashier: [shakes head] Six-five.
Jonathan Mardukas: Dark hair?
Bar Cashier: Light colored.
Jonathan Mardukas: [looks at Jack] Sounds like our man.
Jonathan Mardukas: Did she hurt you, Jack?
Jack Walsh: Yeah, she did.
Jonathan Mardukas: I'm sorry.
Jack Walsh: What're you sorry about?
Jonathan Mardukas: I'm sorry you're hurt.
Jack Walsh: I'm not hurt.
Jonathan Mardukas: You just said you were hurt.
Jack Walsh: I'm not hurt.
Jonathan Mardukas: I just asked you if you were hurt and you said "Yeah, I'm hurt."
Jack Walsh: That's because you made me say that.
Jonathan Mardukas: Jack, you're a grown man. You're in control of your own words.
Jack Walsh: You're goddamn right I am. Now here come two words for you: Shut the fuck up.
Jack Walsh: Yeah, she did.
Jonathan Mardukas: I'm sorry.
Jack Walsh: What're you sorry about?
Jonathan Mardukas: I'm sorry you're hurt.
Jack Walsh: I'm not hurt.
Jonathan Mardukas: You just said you were hurt.
Jack Walsh: I'm not hurt.
Jonathan Mardukas: I just asked you if you were hurt and you said "Yeah, I'm hurt."
Jack Walsh: That's because you made me say that.
Jonathan Mardukas: Jack, you're a grown man. You're in control of your own words.
Jack Walsh: You're goddamn right I am. Now here come two words for you: Shut the fuck up.
Alonzo Mosely: Let me tell you something, asshole. I've been working on this Jimmy Serrano thing for about six years; Mardukas is my shot. I'm gonna bring him into federal court, and I don't want any third-rate rent-a-thug who couldn't cut it as a cop in Chicago bringing him to LA on some bullshit local charge. Do I make myself understood?
Jack Walsh: Can I ask you something? These sunglasses, they're really nice: are they government-issued, or all you guys go to the same store to get them?
Jack Walsh: Can I ask you something? These sunglasses, they're really nice: are they government-issued, or all you guys go to the same store to get them?
Jack Walsh: Oh Marvin, you did it this time!
Marvin Dorfler: What the fuck are you talking about?
Jack Walsh: Those were hired killers back there!
Marvin Dorfler: Hired to kill who?
Jack Walsh: [pointing to Mardukas] Hired to kill this guy!
Jonathan Mardukas: Me! Me, can you believe it?
Marvin Dorfler: Hired by who?
Jack Walsh: Hired by who? Jimmy Serrano, that's who!
Marvin Dorfler: Oh, fuck! Why they wanna kill this guy?
Jack Walsh: Don't you read the papers, knucklehead?
Marvin Dorfler: Yeah, I read the fuckin' papers!
Jonathan Mardukas: I can't take this.
Marvin Dorfler: What the fuck are you talking about?
Jack Walsh: Those were hired killers back there!
Marvin Dorfler: Hired to kill who?
Jack Walsh: [pointing to Mardukas] Hired to kill this guy!
Jonathan Mardukas: Me! Me, can you believe it?
Marvin Dorfler: Hired by who?
Jack Walsh: Hired by who? Jimmy Serrano, that's who!
Marvin Dorfler: Oh, fuck! Why they wanna kill this guy?
Jack Walsh: Don't you read the papers, knucklehead?
Marvin Dorfler: Yeah, I read the fuckin' papers!
Jonathan Mardukas: I can't take this.
Jack Walsh: I never took a payoff in my life and I'm not gonna start with someone like you.
Jonathan Mardukas: Why not?
Jack Walsh: Because you're a fucking criminal and you deserve to go where you're going and I'm gonna take you there and if hear any more shit outta you: I'm gonna fucking bust your head and I'll put you back in that fucking hole and I'm gonna stick your head in the fucking toilet bowl and I'm gonna make it stay there.
Jonathan Mardukas: Why not?
Jack Walsh: Because you're a fucking criminal and you deserve to go where you're going and I'm gonna take you there and if hear any more shit outta you: I'm gonna fucking bust your head and I'll put you back in that fucking hole and I'm gonna stick your head in the fucking toilet bowl and I'm gonna make it stay there.
Jonathan Mardukas: What's the name of this establishment?
Red Wood: Red's Corner Bar.
Jonathan Mardukas: Are you Red?
Red Wood: Yes.
Jonathan Mardukas: Do you dye your hair?
Red Wood: No.
[pause]
Jonathan Mardukas: Why do they call you Red?
Red Wood: It's short for Redwood. My last name's Wood.
Jonathan Mardukas: What's your first name?
Red Wood: Bill.
Red Wood: Red's Corner Bar.
Jonathan Mardukas: Are you Red?
Red Wood: Yes.
Jonathan Mardukas: Do you dye your hair?
Red Wood: No.
[pause]
Jonathan Mardukas: Why do they call you Red?
Red Wood: It's short for Redwood. My last name's Wood.
Jonathan Mardukas: What's your first name?
Red Wood: Bill.
Jimmy Serrano: I thought you said this guy was gonna be on the plane.
Tony Darvo: That's the information we got.
Jimmy Serrano: "That's the information we got." I'm gonna tell you something. I want this guy taken out, and I want him taken out fast. You and that other dummy better start getting more personally involved in your work, or I'm gonna stab you through the heart with a fucking pencil. You get the message?
Tony Darvo: That's the information we got.
Jimmy Serrano: "That's the information we got." I'm gonna tell you something. I want this guy taken out, and I want him taken out fast. You and that other dummy better start getting more personally involved in your work, or I'm gonna stab you through the heart with a fucking pencil. You get the message?
Jonathan Mardukas: Why don't you put the cigarette out.
Jack Walsh: Why don't you shut up and leave me alone?
Jonathan Mardukas: Put the cigarette out, Jack.
Jack Walsh: What a...
Jonathan Mardukas: Put the cigarette out.
Jack Walsh: [laughing, motioning as if putting it out] What a pain in the ass this guy is.
[takes a drag]
Jonathan Mardukas: I thought you were putting it out.
Jack Walsh: No I'm not putting it out.
Jonathan Mardukas: Why aren't you popular with the Chicago Police Department.
Jack Walsh: Why don't you shut up and leave me alone?
Jonathan Mardukas: Put the cigarette out, Jack.
Jack Walsh: What a...
Jonathan Mardukas: Put the cigarette out.
Jack Walsh: [laughing, motioning as if putting it out] What a pain in the ass this guy is.
[takes a drag]
Jonathan Mardukas: I thought you were putting it out.
Jack Walsh: No I'm not putting it out.
Jonathan Mardukas: Why aren't you popular with the Chicago Police Department.
Eddie Moscone: If you bring him in, I'll give you what I'm giving Walsh.
Marvin Dorfler: Yeah, what's that?
Eddie Moscone: Twenty-five thousand. But you gotta bring him in before Friday midnight or the deal's off!
Marvin Dorfler: Don't worry, Eddie. For twenty-five grand I'll bring him in on a silver platter!
Eddie Moscone: Bring him in any way you want, just bring him!
Marvin Dorfler: Yeah, what's that?
Eddie Moscone: Twenty-five thousand. But you gotta bring him in before Friday midnight or the deal's off!
Marvin Dorfler: Don't worry, Eddie. For twenty-five grand I'll bring him in on a silver platter!
Eddie Moscone: Bring him in any way you want, just bring him!
Eddie Moscone: I'm goin' over to Chen Lu's for breakfast, I'll talk to you about it over there.
Jack Walsh: Can I get my money first?
Eddie Moscone: Of course. What, do you think I was gonna try to stiff you?
Jack Walsh: You? Never. You would never try to stiff me.
Eddie Moscone: Do I detect some kind of sarcasm here?
Jack Walsh: Never.
Eddie Moscone: Where have I inherited this reputation? I have never done business with anybody, and Jerry is my witness, that I have ever, ever, ever... has that phone ever rang... has that phone ever rang with a complaint about me? Never... Never! So let's go, I'll buy you some breakfast.
Jack Walsh: Can I get my money first?
Eddie Moscone: Of course. What, do you think I was gonna try to stiff you?
Jack Walsh: You? Never. You would never try to stiff me.
Eddie Moscone: Do I detect some kind of sarcasm here?
Jack Walsh: Never.
Eddie Moscone: Where have I inherited this reputation? I have never done business with anybody, and Jerry is my witness, that I have ever, ever, ever... has that phone ever rang... has that phone ever rang with a complaint about me? Never... Never! So let's go, I'll buy you some breakfast.
Jonathan Mardukas: Why would you eat that?
Jack Walsh: Why? 'Cause it tastes good.
Jonathan Mardukas: But it's not good for you.
Jack Walsh: I'm aware of that.
Jonathan Mardukas: Why do something that you know is not good for you?
Jack Walsh: Because I don't think about it.
Jonathan Mardukas: Well, that's living in denial.
Jack Walsh: Living in denial?
Jonathan Mardukas: Yeah.
Jack Walsh: I'm aware of that.
Jonathan Mardukas: So you're aware of all your behavior?
Jonathan Mardukas: yet you continue to do things that aren't good for you.
Jonathan Mardukas: That sounds sort of foolish. Don't you think, Jack?
Jack Walsh: Why? 'Cause it tastes good.
Jonathan Mardukas: But it's not good for you.
Jack Walsh: I'm aware of that.
Jonathan Mardukas: Why do something that you know is not good for you?
Jack Walsh: Because I don't think about it.
Jonathan Mardukas: Well, that's living in denial.
Jack Walsh: Living in denial?
Jonathan Mardukas: Yeah.
Jack Walsh: I'm aware of that.
Jonathan Mardukas: So you're aware of all your behavior?
Jonathan Mardukas: yet you continue to do things that aren't good for you.
Jonathan Mardukas: That sounds sort of foolish. Don't you think, Jack?
Jack Walsh: Can I have my sunglasses please?
Alonzo Mosely: Here's your sunglasses.
[Mosely spitefully tosses them up and drives off. Jack tries to catch them but they fall on the road and end up chipped]
Jack Walsh: [Sarcastically] Nice.
[Jack pulls Mosely's ID out of his pocket and holds it up]
Jack Walsh: Thanks for this too.
Alonzo Mosely: Here's your sunglasses.
[Mosely spitefully tosses them up and drives off. Jack tries to catch them but they fall on the road and end up chipped]
Jack Walsh: [Sarcastically] Nice.
[Jack pulls Mosely's ID out of his pocket and holds it up]
Jack Walsh: Thanks for this too.
Gail: Jack you shouldn't be here. Ted will come arrest you and him.
Jack Walsh: Arrest us?
Gail: Yeah.
Jack Walsh: Then we're in trouble because I'm afraid I'm little short of bribe money.
Gail: All right Jack, don't.
Jack Walsh: How is Lieutenant whatever-his-name-is?
Gail: It's captain now.
Jack Walsh: Oh, captain! Royalty!
Gail: Jack, I don't want any trouble. Do you understand that? Please. It's not a good day for this. I mean it!
Jack Walsh: I'm sorry my fugitive timetable doesn't coincide with your social calendar.
Jonathan Mardukas: I don't think she's saying that.
Jack Walsh: Stay out of this, John.
Gail: All right, same old Jack. You get your feelings hurt then you just walk around and hurt everybody else.
Jack Walsh: The last thing I need right now is one of your lectures.
Gail: I'm not lecturing you, stupid! I'm trying to protect you.
Jack Walsh: Oh, come on.
Gail: Ted will be home any minute. We're all going out tonight. It's an important night for us.
Jack Walsh: Important night? What so important about tonight? Wait, let me guess. What is it, pay-off night?
Gail: All right, that's it. Get out!
Jack Walsh: Arrest us?
Gail: Yeah.
Jack Walsh: Then we're in trouble because I'm afraid I'm little short of bribe money.
Gail: All right Jack, don't.
Jack Walsh: How is Lieutenant whatever-his-name-is?
Gail: It's captain now.
Jack Walsh: Oh, captain! Royalty!
Gail: Jack, I don't want any trouble. Do you understand that? Please. It's not a good day for this. I mean it!
Jack Walsh: I'm sorry my fugitive timetable doesn't coincide with your social calendar.
Jonathan Mardukas: I don't think she's saying that.
Jack Walsh: Stay out of this, John.
Gail: All right, same old Jack. You get your feelings hurt then you just walk around and hurt everybody else.
Jack Walsh: The last thing I need right now is one of your lectures.
Gail: I'm not lecturing you, stupid! I'm trying to protect you.
Jack Walsh: Oh, come on.
Gail: Ted will be home any minute. We're all going out tonight. It's an important night for us.
Jack Walsh: Important night? What so important about tonight? Wait, let me guess. What is it, pay-off night?
Gail: All right, that's it. Get out!
