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Two victims of traumatized childhoods become lovers and psychopathic serial murderers irresponsibly glorified by the mass media.
Old Indian: Once upon a time, a woman was picking up firewood. She came upon a poisonous snake frozen in the snow. She took the snake home and nursed it back to health. One day the snake bit her on the cheek. As she lay dying, she asked the snake, "Why have you done this to me?" And the snake answered, "Look, bitch, you knew I was a snake."
Mickey: It's just murder. All God's creatures do it. You look in the forests and you see species killing other species, our species killing all species including the forests, and we just call it industry, not murder.
Mickey: I realized my true calling in life. Wayne Gale: What's that? Mickey: Shit, man, I'm a natural born killer.
Mickey: It's fate, you know. Nobody can stop fate, nobody can.
Mickey: You'll never understand, Wayne. You and me, we're not even the same species. I used to be you, then I evolved. From where you're standing, you're a man. From where I'm standing, you're an ape. You're not even an ape. You're a media person. Media's like the weather, only it's man-made weather. Murder? It's pure. You're the one made it impure. You're buying and selling fear. You say "why?" I say "why bother?"
Mickey: Mister rabbit says, "A moment of realization is worth a thousand prayers."
Dr. Emil Reingold: Mickey and Mallory know the difference between right and wrong, they just don't give a damn.
Mickey: You know, the only thing that kills the demon... is love.
Mickey: The whole world's comin' to an end, Mal! Mallory: I see angels, Mickey. They're comin' down for us from heaven. And I see you ridin' a big red horse, and you're driving them horses, whippin' 'em, and the're spitting and frothing all 'long the mouth, and the're coming right at us. And I see the future, and there's no death, 'cause you and I, we're angels... Mickey: I love you, Mal. Mallory: I know you do baby, and I've loved you since the day we met.
Mickey: We're not killing anybody on our wedding day.
Mickey: The media is like the weather, only it's man-made weather.
Mickey: [Wayne is pleading for his life] This is not about you, you egomaniac. I kinda like you. But if we let you go, we'd be just like everybody else. Killing you and what you represent is a statement.
Mickey: Let me tell you something, this is the 1990's, alright? In this day and age a man has to have choices, a man has to have a little bit of variety. Mallory: What are you talking about, "variety"? Hostages? You wanna fuck some other women now? Is that what you're talking about, Mickey?
Mickey: [pointing a shotgun at Homolka] Okay, DROP IT! Deputy Sheriff Duncan Homolka: [drops a donut] Mickey: The GUN, goddammit!
Mickey: Baby... by the power invested in me, as God of my world... I pronounce us husband and wife.
[bleeding together over a river] Mallory: We'll be living in all the oceans now.
Wayne Gale: Wait! Don't Mickey and Mallory always leave one person alive to tell the tale? Mallory: We are... Mallory, Mickey: Your camera!
Druggist: I'm the only clerk left! I'm the only clerk left! Mickey: You're forgetting one thing... Druggist: W-what's that? Mickey: If I don't kill you, what is there to talk about? You fuckin' squid! [shoots him]
Mickey: At birth, I was cast into a flaming pit of scum forgotten by God.
Dwight McClusky: Just how far do you think you're gonna get? Mickey: Right out the front door! Dwight McClusky: THAT WILL *NEVER HAPPEN!* Mickey: It IS happenin'. Dwight McClusky: I will personally hunt you down, blow the head off your fucking whore wife, AND PLANT YOUR SICK ASS IN THE GROUND ALL BY MYSELF! Mickey: Another day, perhaps, but not today!
Mickey: You can't hide from your shadow.
Mallory: You made my shitlist!
[after shooting a man she'd been having sex with] Mallory: That the worst fuckin' head I ever got in my life! Next time don't be so fuckin' eager!
Napalatoni: Warden! Dwight McClusky: Yes! What is it, Natapundi? Napalatoni: Napalatoni! Dwight McClusky: I DON'T CARE WHAT YOUR FUCKING NAME IS! Napalatoni: Mickey and Mallory Knox are loose, Scagnetti's dead, and they're live on national TV! Dwight McClusky: LIVE ON NATIONAL TV? JESUS HAROLD CHRIST ON A FUCKING RUBBER CRUTCH, IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME?
Mickey: Even ugliness looks beautiful next to you.
[after beating the hell out of the guy at the diner] Mallory: How sexy am I now, huh? Flirty boy! How sexy am I now?
Mallory: Wherever we go, whatever happens, Mickey, when I look up at the stars, I'll know you'll be lookin' up at the same ones. Mickey: Same ones, baby. Mallory: You make everyday feel like kindergarten.
Dwight McClusky: Mickey & Mallory Knox are without a doubt the most twisted depraved pair of shitfucks it has ever been my displeasure to lay my goddamn eyes on. I tell you these two motherfuckers are a walking reminder of just how fucked up this system really is.
Mickey: Right now, I'd go down on a lawman for a gallon of gas.
Mallory: I do. For all eternity. 'Til you and I die, and die, and die again. 'Til death do us part.
Son: What the hell is that? Father: A bitch out of hell, son. Take a run at her, kiddo!
Mallory: You killed life!
[as he strangles a girl] Jack Scagnetti: I'm just kidding, I'm just kidding...
Mallory: I don't think I'm gonna make it. I feel so cold. Mickey: You're gonna make it, Mal. Get mad.
[the cops have Mickey and Mallory pinned down] Mallory: You know what I say? I say... to hell with going back to our cells. Let's go out there, and run down the stairs, and go out in a hail of bullets. And then we'll die! And then we'll really be free. Mickey: That's poetry. But we'll do that when all else fails.
Reporter: Do you have anything to say to your fans? Mickey: You ain't seen nothin' yet.
Mickey: Mal... Mallory: Yes? Mickey: Will you marry me? Mallory: Of course I'll marry you! I've been waiting for you to say that for so long. But where are we gonna get married? Mickey: Right here, Mal. This is our church.
Mallory: I do. 'Til you and I die, and die, and die again. 'Til death do us part.
Wayne Gale: So tell me Mickey? Any regrets? I mean, three weeks, fifty people killed... not too cool Mickey. Mickey: Fifty-two, but I don't a lot of time with regret. That's a wasted emotion. Wayne Gale: Seriously you must have some regret. Rack your brain. Mickey: Well, I wish that Indian hadn't got killed. Mallory: [archive footage of the Indian's death] Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad! Wayne Gale: [looks at some files] One of your last victims. Mickey: Man had a rattlesnake in the corner...
Wayne Gale: What about your father how did he die? You were only ten years old and there's a lot of speculation. Mickey: I didn't kill my father and I don't want to talk about it! [starts to get angry and makes as if to jump up] Mickey: . Dwight McClusky: [leaps to his feet] Hey! Hey! Wayne Gale: [to everyone around him] It's alright! It's alright! [turns back to Mickey] Wayne Gale: We'll just move on to something else. Mickey: Please let's do.
Ed Wilson: Don't think! You're a fucking idiot! Who am I now, the bad guy? Did I ask you to fuck my friends?
[repeated line] Mickey: Hey, Jack! Mickey's back!
[McClusky tackles an inmate] Dwight McClusky: Put him in F Block for a month, then bring him to see me! Jack Scagnetti: Jesus Christ, Dwight. You could be on "American Gladiators". Dwight McClusky: Thirty minutes a day, just shake and roll it... doesn't take much. Someone goes for you, you go right for the throat, Jack.
Pinky: Are you a real cop? Jack Scagnetti: Oh yeah, I'm a real cop. Pinky: You're not gonna hurt me are ya? Jack Scagnetti: I never hurt anyone in my life. I'm the law. I'm your protector.
Mickey: Turn left? Turn left to what, you stupid bitch? Mallory: You stupid bitch? You stupid bitch? You stupid bitch? Mickey, that's what my father used to call me! I thought you'd be a little more creative than that!
Ed Wilson: If it wasn't for me, you'd still be slingin' hash in that shithouse and fuckin' your boss.
Wayne Gale: [after Mickey Knox takes over] Where's Roger? Roger: [pops out] I'm right here! Wayne Gale: Where's Scotty? Roger: He's hit- I-I think he's dead.
Jack Scagnetti: How the hell are my two favorite assholes?
Mickey: Uh, aloha? Chief? Yeah, uh... rattlesnake took a chunk outta us a few miles back... me and my wife are pretty sick - could be dyin,' you never can tell about these things, so... how's about you ungluin' your fat ass from that boob tube and gettin' us some snakebite juice? Pronto.
[Studying Mallory's imprint at a crime scene] Jack Scagnetti: Now that is a perfect ass.
[aiming Jack's gun at his head] Mallory: You still like me now, Jack? [she pulls the trigger]
Redneck's Buddy in the Diner: That's some sweet piece of meat, ain't it? Mickey: Her name's... Mallory. Redneck's Buddy in the Diner: Mallory... whatever... who gives a shit? I call it pussy.
[On a TV interview] Boy 1: Mickey and Mallory are the best thing to happen to mass murder since Manson. Boy 2: Yeah! But... they're way cooler!
Scagnetti: I was born and spent the first part of my life in Texas. Dwight McClusky: That's funny, you don't have the accent. Scagnetti: I don't wanna talk like those assholes. Dwight McClusky: My mother was from Texas! Scagnetti: I meant those other assholes.
Wayne Gale: Repetition works, David. Repetition works, David.
[after sending Mallory to her room] Ed Wilson: I'll show her a little tenderness, after I eat. When I get up there, she won't see my face for an hour.
Mickey: One camera all you can muster, Jack? Jack Scagnetti: You ain't that big a star yet, cocksucker.
Mallory: What do you want me to do? Jack Scagnetti: I want you to kiss me and squeeze my nipple. Mallory: You're so specific.
Dwight McClusky: I'm surprised Hollywood ain't caught up with you yet, your story'd make a much better movie than that Serpico shit.
Jack Scagnetti: I tend not to exhibit the self-discipline, you know, becoming of a peace officer.
Mickey: Well, let's give that key lime pie a day in court, and a big old glass of non-fat milk, if you please.
Ed Wilson: I eat what I want! So what! I mean, with this fucking food here, you pray after you eat.
Wayne Gale: Their subsequent trial turned into a sick, pathetic circus. The trial of Mickey and Mallory Knox was SUCH an event, that it made the crime spree that preceded it pale by comparison. The nation caught Mickey and Mallory fire!
Dwight McClusky: Love makes the world go round, heh heh heh.
Dwight McClusky: How's a fella like you get to be involved with psychos, anyways? Jack Scagnetti: Actually Dwight, I'd recommend having your mother killed by one. After that happened I developed a rather keen interest in the subject.
[to Mallory] Jack Scagnetti: Remember the last time you got fucked? What I want you to do is close your eyes, and remember the last time Mickey gave you the high hard one. You thinking about it? Good. Well you can forget it, 'cause it's never gonna happen again. Because when they get through with all the electroshock shit they got lined up for that cocksucker, ol' Mickey ain't gonna be worth a damn.
Mallory: I'm not really as bad as they say I am. I'm actually a really nice person. Jack Scagnetti: Yeah I know. I did some pretty bad things myself. I killed someone.
Wayne Gale: Mallory Knox has said that she wants to kill you. Dr. Emil Reingold: I never really believe what women tell me.
[Guns aimed at each other] Mickey: Looks like we got us a Mexican Standoff. Jack Scagnetti: We've had this day from the beginning, huh, Mickey? Now slide that shotgun over here. Put your hands on your head and your head against the floor! Mickey: Or what, you'll wound me? I could blow you in half and you know it. Jack Scagnetti: I never wounded anything in my life. I got you locked right between the eyes, Mickey. I've had you locked from the jump, you phony!
Wayne Gale: I thought a bond developed between us! Mickey: No. Not really. You're scum, Wayne; you did it for RATINGS. You don't give a shit about us or anybody else except yourself; that's why nobody gives a shit about YOU. That's why "helicopters" were not "deployed."
Scagnetti: Oswald might've been a pussy, but he was a great shot.