Detective Chris Kenner was orphaned as a child as his father was in the service and was killed and lived in Japan. Now he is on the trail of ruthless Yakuza leader named Yoshido, who helped... See full summary¬†¬Ľ

Johnny Murata: Kenner, just in case we get killed, I wanted to tell you, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen on a man.
Chris Kenner: [nods] Thanks. I don't know what to say.
Johnny Murata: How about "Don't get killed"?
Chris Kenner: Don't get killed.
Johnny Murata: You too.
Johnny Murata: Ya know, it's kinda like one of those video games... you just defeated the first wave.
Chris Kenner: Do you know you have moments when you're truly an asshole?
Johnny Murata: Cop. Policeman, Understand? It's bad to shoot me. He's a cop too. It's bad to shoot him.
Johnny Murata: We've got a problem here. There are more bad guys than we've got bullets.
Johnny Murata: You have the right to be dead.
Chris Kenner: Hey, she was frightened.
Johnny Murata: Yeah, I saw you strip down for that hot tub. I'd be frightened, too...
[Kenner says some words in Japanese]
Johnny Murata: What did that mean?
Det. Kenner: Roughly translated, out of the frying pan and boned up the ass with a red-hot poker.
Johnny Murata: There you have it.
Chris Kenner: [they've been partners less than a day] Look, I'm gonna call your chief, tell him it's not working out, and send you back to wherever it is you came from.
Johnny Murata: Don't do that. They really don't want me back. I have a problem keeping partners too.
Chris Kenner: I can see why. I hate you already.
Minako: This is a nice place.
Chris Kenner: I built it.
Johnny Murata: I wanted to work in Malibu.
Chris Kenner: That'll never happen.
Johnny Murata: Thanks, that's supportive. I've joined you on this quest for personal vengeance and you've got to take a shot at my dreams?
Chris Kenner: Malibu's Sheriff's Department, not LAPD.
Johnny Murata: Really? Damn.
Det. Kenner: [Jonny beats up some guys to let Kenner through] How long did you study?
Johnny Murata: Since I was four.
Det. Kenner: Should've started earlier. That would've helped your form.
Johnny Murata: I was four! There's nothing wrong with my form.
Johnny Murata: You know all of that upper body strength really slows you down.
Chris Kenner: I'm not slow.
Johnny Murata: You didn't hit me.
Chris Kenner: If I did, you wouldn't be here.
Johnny Murata: Not arguing. But you didn't...
[Kenner is aiming a gun at the main bad guy]
Johnny Murata: Well? Are you gonna kill him?
Det. Kenner: Not right now... Maybe later.
Johnny Murata: Listen, will you do this right? Clean? Like a cop in the 20th century, not some samurai warrior? We're gonna nail this guy. And when we get done... we're gonna go eat fish off those naked chicks!
Johnny Murata: [sees Japanese businessmen eating sushi off of a naked woman] You know that thing I said about the fish? I can change my mind...
Johnny Murata: This may sound strange for a cop: Let's get the fuck out of here.
Chris Kenner: I liked that car. And I liked that girl. And I'd like to cut off certain parts of Yoshida's anatomy.
Johnny Murata: Ya know, you've got a fixation, pal...
Yoshida: You are dead!
Chris Kenner: Hell sucked! We are back!
[last lines]
Johnny Murata: What are we going to call this in the police report?
Chris Kenner: How about "community relations"?
Johnny Murata: We blew up the crime scene, killed the suspects...
Chris Kenner: ...and joined the local parade.
Johnny Murata: I like it!
Chris Kenner: Bad news: the asshole found us first.
Johnny Murata: We do this right. Like a cop in the 20th century and not some warrior, we're gonna get this guy. And when we're done we're gonna go eat fish off those naked chicks!
Det. Kenner: This is for my parents.
Johnny Murata: That's perfect... I'm partnered with a homicidal maniac on a personal vendetta of family vengeance.
Johnny Murata: So shall we get down and kick some ass?
Chris Kenner: No. I'm gonna enjoy being dead for a while.
Yoshida: How American! The backseat, the movies, the beautiful girl... You know what's missing? Popcorn.
Yoshida: [Opens up a beer bottle which pours out pills of some kind] Now, America can enjoy our beer *and* our drugs while watching football.
Minako: [laughs]
Chris Kenner: What?
Minako: That time I heard you coming!
Johnny Murata: [to Kenner] Listen you Zen warrior, fucking samurai asshole! I wanna know what's up!
Johnny Murata: [about to enter the Bansai Club] I'm warning you, I don't eat raw fish. But that's just me.
Yoshida: Now you only have one hand with which to wipe your ass with,do you want to keep the other one?.
Johnny Murata: There's nothing wrong with my form!

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