An alien orphan is sent from his dying planet to Earth, where he grows up to become his adoptive home's first and greatest superhero.

Jor-El: [bidding his son farewell, as Lara looks on] You will travel far, my little Kal-El. But we will never leave you... even in the face of our death. The richness of our lives shall be yours. All that I have, all that I've learned, everything I feel... all this, and more, I... I bequeath you, my son. You will carry me inside you, all the days of your life. You will make my strength your own, and see my life through your eyes, as your life will be seen through mine. The son becomes the father, and the father the son. This is all I... all I can send you, Kal-El.
Superman: Easy, miss. I've got you.
Lois Lane: You - you've got me? Who's got you?
Young Clark Kent: All those things I can do. All those powers. And I couldn't even save him.
[as Clark discovers his heritage, this is his father's final message to him]
Jor-El: Live as one of them, Kal-El, to discover where your strength and your power are needed. But always hold in your heart the pride of your special heritage. They can be a great people, Kal-El, they wish to be. They only lack the light to show the way. For this reason above all, their capacity for good, I have sent them you... my only son.
Perry White: Now listen to me, I tell you boys and girls - whichever one of you gets it out... is going to wind up with the single most important interview since... God talked to Moses!
[Superman surprises Lois on her balcony]
Lois Lane: Um, um, would you like a glass of wine?
Superman: Uh, no, no thanks. I never drink when I fly.
Lex Luthor: Some people can read War and Peace and come away thinking it's a simple adventure story. Others can read the ingredients on a chewing gum wrapper and unlock the secrets of the universe.
[as Jor-El is preparing to send his son to Earth before the destruction of Krypton, Lara enters the room with the infant, Kal-El]
Lara: Have you finished?
Jor-El: Nearly. It's the only answer, Lara. If he remains here with us... he will die as surely as we will.
Lara: But why Earth, Jor-El? They're primitives, thousands of years behind us.
Jor-El: He will need that advantage to survive. Their atmosphere will... sustain him.
[He looks at his son and walks over to the area where the ship that will carry Kal-El lies. There are information crystals placed in slots on the edges]
Lara: He will defy their gravity.
Jor-El: He will look like one of them.
Lara: He won't *be* one of them.
Jor-El: No. His dense molecular structure will make him strong.
Lara: He'll be odd. Different.
Jor-El: He'll be fast. Virtually invulnerable.
Lara: Isolated. Alone.
Jor-El: He will not be alone.
[He holds up a clear crystal and takes a long look at it]
Jor-El: He will never be alone.
[He places it in one of the slots along with the other crystals in the ship]
Co Pilot: [Superman supports Air Force One's damaged wing] What the hell happened, we got our engine back? What the hell is going on out there?
Air Force One Pilot: Fly. Don't look, just fly. We got... something. I ain't saying what it is. Just... trust me.
[first scene: General Zod and his minions are on trial. Jor-El states the accusations]
Jor-El: This is no fantasy - no careless product of wild imagination. No, my good friends. These indictments I have brought to you today, specific charges listed herein against the individuals, their acts of treason, their ultimate aim of sedition. These... are matters of undeniable fact. I ask you now to pronounce judgement on those accused.
[Jor-El approaches the accused. He points at Non]
Jor-El: On this... this mindless aberration, whose only means of expression are wanton violence and destruction.
[Jor-El looks at Ursa]
Jor-El: On the woman Ursa, whose perversions and unreasoning hatred of all mankind have threatened even the children of the planet Krypton.
[Jor-El approaches Zod]
Jor-El: Finally, General Zod, once trusted by this council, charged with maintaining the defense of the planet Krypton itself! Chief architect of this intended revolution and author of this insidious plot, to establish a new order amongst us, with himself as absolute ruler!
[pause]
Jor-El: You have heard the evidence. The decision of the council will now be heard!
[all members of the Council announce "guilty!"]
General Zod: The vote must be unanimous, Jor-El. It has therefore now become your decision. You alone will condemn us if you wish, and you alone will be held responsible by me.
[pause]
General Zod: Join us.
[wordlessly, Jor-El starts walking away]
General Zod: You have been known to disagree with the council before. Yours could become an important voice in the new order, second only to my own! I offer you a chance for greatness, Jor-El! Take it! Join us!
[Jor-El keeps walking away, oblivious to Zod's words]
General Zod: You will bow down before me, Jor-El! I swear it! No matter that it takes an eternity, you will bow down before me! Both you and then one day, your heirs!
[the three villains are locked inside the phantom zone]
Jor-El: [at the Fortress of Solitude] So, my son. Speak.
Young Clark Kent: Who am I?
Jor-El: Your name is Kal-El. You are the only survivor of the planet Krypton. Even though you've been raised as a human, you are not one of them. You have great powers, only some of which you have as yet discovered.
[Interviewing Superman]
Lois Lane: How big are you... um... how *tall* are you?
Lana Lang: [driving up with Brad] Hey, there's Clark! Clark?
Brad: How'd you get here so fast?
Young Clark Kent: [shrugs] I ran.
Brad: "Ran," huh? Told ya he's an oddball. Let's get outta here.
[they drive away, Lana looking back at Clark]
Jonathan Kent: Been showing off a bit, haven't you, son?
Young Clark Kent: [going over to Jonathan] Um... I didn't mean to show off, Pop. It's just that, guys like that Brad, I just want to tear him apart.
Jonathan Kent: Yeah, I know, I know.
Young Clark Kent: And I know I shouldn't...
Jonathan Kent: Yeah, I know, you can do all these amazing things and sometimes you feel like you will just go bust unless you can tell people about them.
Young Clark Kent: Yeah. I mean every time I kick the football I can make a touchdown. Every time! I mean, is it showing off if somebody's doing the things he's capable of doing? Is a bird showing off when it flies?
Jonathan Kent: No, no. Now, you listen to me. When you first came to us, we thought people would come and take you away because, when they found out, you know, the things you could do... and that worried us a lot. But then a man gets older, and he starts thinking differently and things get very clear. And one thing I do know, son, and that is you are here for a *reason*. I don't know whose reason, or whatever the reason is... Maybe it's because... uh... I don't know. But I do know one thing. It's *not* to score touchdowns. Huh?
[they laugh]
Young Clark Kent: Thanks, Dad.
Military Officer: The energy input to Jor-El's quarters is now in excess. Our data indicates the loss is due to a mis-use of energy.
First Elder: Investigate.
2nd Elder: And if the investigation proves correct?
First Elder: He knew the penalty he faced, even as a member of this Council. The law will be upheld.
Lois Lane: Can you read my mind? Do you know what it is that you do to me? I don't know who you are. Just a friend from another star. Here I am, like a kid out of school. Holding hands with a god. I'm a fool. Will you look at me? Quivering. Like a little girl, shivering. You can see right through me. Can you read my mind? Can you picture the things I'm thinking of? Wondering why you are... all the wonderful things you are. You can fly. You belong in the sky. You and I... could belong to each other. If you need a friend... I'm the one to fly to. If you need to be loved... here I am. Read my mind.
Lex Luthor: We all have our little faults. Mine's in California.
Clark Kent: Really, Lois, supposing that man had shot you? Is it worth risking your life over ten dollars, two credit cards, a hairbrush, and a lipstick?
Lois Lane: How did you know that?
Clark Kent: Know what?
Lois Lane: You just described the exact contents of my purse.
[Clark peeks in her purse]
Clark Kent: Hmm. Uh, wild guess.
Perry White: Lois, Clark Kent may seem like just a mild-mannered reporter, but listen, not only does he know how to treat his editor-in-chief with the proper respect, not only does he have a snappy, punchy prose style, but he is, in my forty years in this business, the fastest typist I've ever seen.
Lois Lane: [being rescued, stammering] Who... are you?
Superman: A friend.
[flies away]
Superman: [waves] Bye.
[Lois waves, and stares at Superman, then sinks into a faint]
Clark Kent: [in Superman's voice] Lois, there's something I have to tell you. I'm really...
[In Clark's voice]
Clark Kent: I-I mean I was, at first, really nervous about tonight, uh... but then I decided, darn it! I'm gonna show you the time of your life.
Lois Lane: [still infatuated with Superman] That's Clark, nice.
Jor-El: [in the Fortress of Solitude] You... enjoyed it.
Superman: I don't know what to say, Father. I'm afraid I just got carried away.
Jor-El: I anticipated this, my son. I...
Superman: [surprised] You couldn't have! You couldn't have imagined...
Jor-El: ...How good it felt.
[Clark nods]
Jor-El: You are revealed to the world. Very well, so be it. But you must still keep your secret identity.
Superman: But why?
Jor-El: The reasons are two. First, you cannot serve humanity twenty-eight hours a day.
Superman: Twenty-four.
Jor-El: Or twenty-four, as it is in Earth time. Your help would be called for endlessly, even for those problems which human beings could solve themselves. It is their habit to abuse their resources in such a way.
Superman: And, secondly?
Jor-El: Secondly, your enemies will discover their only way to hurt you: by hurting the people you care for.
Superman: Thank you, Father.
Jor-El: Lastly... Do not punish yourself for your feelings of vanity. Simply learn to control them. It is an affliction common to all, even on Krypton. Our destruction could have been avoided had it not been for the vanity of some who considered us indestructible. Were it not for vanity, why... at this very moment...
[sadly]
Jor-El: I could embrace you in my arms. My son.
[Kal-El reaches yearningly toward his father's image; Jor-El fades, leaving Kal-El alone]
[Superman and Lois are standing on opposite sides of a large planter]
Lois Lane: What color underwear am I wearing?
Superman: [looking] Hmmm...
Lois Lane: Oh, I'm sorry, I embarrassed you, didn't I?
Superman: Oh, no, no, no, not at all, Miss Lane, it's just that this planter must be made of lead.
Lois Lane: Uh, yes it is. So?
Superman: Well, you see, I, uh, I sort of have a problem seeing through lead.
Lois Lane: Oh, that's interesting.
Lois Lane: [Writing] Problem seeing through lead. Hmmm. Uh, d-do you have a first name?
Superman: What do you mean, like, uh, Ralph or something?
Lois Lane: No, no, I mean like...
[walks away from the planter]
Superman: Pink.
Lois Lane: Huh?
Superman: Pink.
[Lois walks back to the planter]
Superman: Um, sorry, Miss Lane, I didn't mean to embarrass you.
Miss Teschmacher: Why is it I can't get it on with the good guys?
Superman: I'm here to fight for truth, and justice, and the American way.
Lois Lane: [laughs] You're gonna end up fighting every elected official in this country!
[a thug strikes Superman from behind with a crowbar, it vibrates his hands]
Superman: Bad vibrations?
Desk Sergeant: [on seeing a boat in the middle of the street and Superman flying off] Mooney, first bottle's on me, let me get my hat.
[first lines]
Boy: In the decade of the 1930s, even the great city of Metropolis was not spared the ravages of the worldwide depression. In times of fear and confusion, the job of informing the public was the responsibility of the Daily Planet, a great metropolitan newspaper whose reputation for clarity and truth had become the symbol for hope in the city of Metropolis...
[Lex stands on his library sliding ladder searching for a book]
Lex Luthor: n... n... n...
Otis: 'M'! You want 'M' Mr. Luthor?
[Otis moves the sliding ladder Lex is standing on, leaving Lex hanging from a shelf]
Otis: So, there you go, 'M'.
Lex Luthor: 'M' as in moron Otis? No, no, no, it's 'N'! 'N' as in neanderthal, nincompoop, nitwit and 'L' as in ladder!
[Martha Kent sees her son Clark standing outside in the wheat field, and she approaches him]
Young Clark Kent: I have to leave.
Ma Kent: I knew this day would come. We both knew it from the day we found you.
Young Clark Kent: I talked to Ben Hubbard yesterday. He said that... he'd be happy to help out from now on.
[Clark's composure is rapidly breaking down]
Young Clark Kent: Mother...
Ma Kent: I know, son. I know. Do you... know where you're headed?
Young Clark Kent: [nods] North.
[pause]
Ma Kent: Remember us, Clark. Always remember us.
[they embrace, and watch the sun rise over the wheat field]
Lex Luthor: Miss Teschmacher, when I was six years old my father said to me...
Miss Teschmacher: "Get out!"
Lex Luthor: [laughing] Before that. He said, "Son, stocks may rise and fall, utilities and transportation systems may collapse. People are no damn good, but they will always need land and they will pay through the nose to get it! Remember," my father said...
Otis: "... land."
Lex Luthor: Right. It's a pity he couldn't see from such humble beginnings how I've created this empire.
Miss Teschmacher: An empire? This?
Lex Luthor: Miss Teschmacher, how many girls do you know who have a Park Avenue address like this one?
Miss Teschmacher: [sarcastically] A Park Avenue address? Two hundred feet below?
Lex Luthor: Do you realize what people are shelling out up there, for a few miserable rooms off a common elevator?
Lex Luthor, Otis: What more could anyone ask?
Lois Lane: What a super man... "Superman"!
Young Lois Lane: Golly! I saw a boy out there run as fast as the train! Faster, even!
Ella Lane: [laughing] Oh, Lois Lane. You have a writer's gift for invention; I'll say that for you.
Young Lois Lane: But... but...
General Sam Lane: Uh, Lois, please read your book.
Young Lois Lane: [going back to her book, sulky] No one ever believes me.
The Pimp: Say, Jim, whoo!
Superman: Excuse me.
[flies off]
The Pimp: That's a bad outfit! Whoo!
Superman: Uh, you really shouldn't smoke, you know, Miss Lane.
Lois Lane: Don't tell me. Lung cancer, right?
Superman: [x-rays her lungs] Well, not yet, thank goodness.
Clark Kent: Excuse me, Mr. White. I was wondering if, if, uh, perhaps you could arrange for half my salary to be sent to this address on a weekly basis.
Lois Lane: Your bookie, right?
Clark Kent: My what?
Lois Lane: Don't tell me: he sends a check every week to his sweet, grey-haired old mother.
Clark Kent: Actually, she's silver-haired.
[after the council finds Zod and his henchmen guilty]
General Zod: The vote must be unanimous, Jor-El. It has therefore now become your decision. You alone will condemn us if you wish, and you alone will be held responsible by me.
Jor-El: [to Kal-El] The early history of our universe was a bloody mosaic of interplanetary war.
[repeated line]
Lex Luthor: [shouting] Miss Teschmacher!
Jor-El: Krypton!
Lex Luthor: Look at the overgrown boy scout, Miss Teschmacher. Tell me what you see.
Miss Teschmacher: Cuteness, dimples.
Lex Luthor: You like cuteness, huh? Dimples. I'll give you dimples.
[turns the machine guns on Superman in tunnel]
Lex Luthor: [swimming in the pool, listening to news broadcasts about Superman] Miss Teschmacher! Turn it off.
Miss Teschmacher: [lying by the sunlamps] Lex, what's the story on this guy? Do you think it's the genuine article?
Lex Luthor: If he is, he's not from this world.
Miss Teschmacher: Why?
Lex Luthor: Because, if any human being were going to perpetrate such a fantastic hoax, it would have been me! Otis! My robe!
Otis: Right away, Mr. Luthor!
Lex Luthor: It all fits somehow, his coming here to Metropolis. And at this particular time. There's a kind of cruel justice about it. I mean, to commit the crime of the century, a man naturally wants to face the challenge of the century.
Otis: Listen, Mr. Luthor, maybe this guy that flies is just sort of passing through, you know?
Lex Luthor: [Lex gets out of the pool, and stops at the top step. Otis starts helping Lex on with the robe as the bottom of it proceeds to get soaked] Passing through? Not on your life. Which I would gladly sacrifice, by the way, for the opportunity of destroying everything that he represents. And, Otis, by the way, next time put my robe on *after* I'm out of the pool.
Otis: Oooohhhh!
Lex Luthor: There's a strong streak of good in you, Superman. But then nobody's perfect... almost nobody.
[pointing to a map of California and the San Andreas Fault]
Lex Luthor: Everything west of this line is the richest, most expensive real estate in the world: San Diego, Los Angeles, San Francisco. Everything on THIS side of the line is just hundreds and hundreds of miles of worthless desert land, which just so happens to be owned by...
[Whaps Otis with his pointer]
Otis: Uhhh... Lex Luthor Incorporated.
Lex Luthor: Now, call me foolish, call me irresponsible, but it occurs to me that a 500 megaton bomb planted at just the proper point would, uh...
Superman: Would destroy most of California. Millions of innocent people would be killed. The west coast as we know it would...
Lex Luthor: Fall into the sea.
Lex Luthor: [Gives a little wave with his hand] Bye-bye, California. Hello, new west coast. My west coast.
[Otis overlays map with new map]
Lex Luthor: Costa Del Lex. Luthorville. Marina del Lex. Otisburg... Otisburg?
Otis: Miss Teschmacher, she's got her own place.
Lex Luthor: Otisburg?
Otis: It's a little bitty place.
Lex Luthor: [Angrily] *Otisburg*?
Otis: Okay, I'll just wipe it off, that's all. Just a little town.
[Erases Otisburg]
[Superman lands holding a cat burglar]
Superman: Officer! Uh, good evening Officer...
[glancing at the officer's nametag]
Superman: Mooney. Well, they say confession's good for the soul.
[takes a handful of stolen jewelry out of the burglar's bag]
Superman: I'd listen to this man. Take him away.
General Zod: Join us. You have been known to disagree with the Council before. Yours could become an important voice in the new order, second only to my own! I offer you a chance for greatness, Jor-El! Take it! Join us!... You *will* bow down before me, Jor-El. I swear it! No matter that it takes an eternity, you *will* bow down before me! Both you, and then one day, your heirs!
Lois Lane: Oh, hi Rex!
Rex Reed: Hey Lois!
Lois Lane: See anything good today?
Rex Reed: Not 'til you came along.
Lois Lane: Oh, Rex, this is, uh...
Clark Kent: Clark Kent.
Rex Reed: Yeah, see you around.
Superman: You don't even care where that other missile is headed, do you?
Lex Luthor: Of course I do. I know exactly where it's headed. Hackensack, New Jersey.
[he pushes Superman into the pool]
Jimmy Olsen: What are you writing, Miss Lane?
Lois Lane: An ode to spring. How do you spell massacre?
Lois Lane: Any more at home like you?
Clark Kent: Uh, not really, no.
First Elder: [following the trial and sentencing of General Zod] An unpleasant duty has been masterly performed, Jor-El. They have received the fate they deserve: isolation in the Phantom Zone, an eternal living death.
Jor-El: A chance for life, nonetheless... as opposed to us. It's suicide! No, it's worse. It's GENOCIDE!
First Elder: Be warned, Jor-El. The Council has already evaluated this outlandish theory of yours.
Jor-El: My friends, you know me to be neither rash nor impulsive. I'm not given to wild, unsupported statements. And I tell you that we must evacuate this planet immediately!
[Superman appears in Luthor's office]
Lex Luthor: Otis, take the gentleman's cape.
[Superman glares]
Otis: I don't think he wants me to, Mr. Luthor.
Superman: Why did... why did you kiss me first?
Miss Teschmacher: I didn't think you'd let me later.
[Miss Teschmacher is posing as the victim of a car wreck]
Sergeant Hayley: She's having trouble breathing sir. What do you think?
Major: Well, I suggest a vigorous chest massage, and if that doesn't work, uh, mouth-to-mouth.
Sergeant Hayley: [enthusiastically] Yes, sir!
[bends to the task]
Major: [the Major pulls him to his feet] Sergeant, I won't have one of my men doing anything I wouldn't be prepared to do myself.
Sergeant Hayley: [disappointed] Yeah, but, sir!
Major: Get an ambulance. All right, men. Gather around. About face!
2nd Elder: [after Jor-El has told all of them how the Red Sun will destabilize and burst, causing Krypton to do the same] Jor-El, be REASONABLE.
Jor-El: My friend, I've never been otherwise. This madness is yours.
Lex Luthor: [to Otis] You were followed again.
[Otis spins around, knocking over a lamp]
Lex Luthor: ...in spite of those catlike reflexes.
Lois Lane: As you know, my newspaper, the Daily Planet, is very interested in that dam, Chief, but what I don't understand is why you would sell out to a faceless person that you've never met. I mean, you don't even know his name.
[the Chief taps on Lois' dashboard as she goes off the road]
Lois Lane: Oh, yeah!
Indian Chief: At the stupid high price that he offered for this worthless piece of desert, I hope it's Custer!
Lois Lane: Perfect! That's just what I need. Thank you.
Miss Teschmacher: It's too good to be true! He's 6-4, has black hair, blue eyes, doesn't drink, doesn't smoke, and tells the truth!
[Otis tells Lex how he's inputted the coordinates on the missile]
Lex Luthor: Otis! The third one was to be 11, and the fourth one, seven!
Otis: Oh. Oh, gee. Aw, gee. Gee, Mr. Luthor. Oh, I see. I guess my arm wasn't long enough, see?
Lex Luthor: Otis, would you like to see a long arm? Otis, would you like to see a very, very long arm?
Otis: Oh, no, Mr. Luthor.
[Watching Otis approaching the hideout]
Lex Luthor: It's amazing that brain can generate enough power to keep those legs moving.
[last lines]
Warden: This country is safe again, Superman, thanks to you.
Superman: No, sir. Don't thank me, Warden. We're all part of the same team. Good night.
[Lex switches on the remote door, pushing the police officer into the subway train's path killing him]
Miss Teschmacher: Sick. You're really sick.
Lex Luthor: Sick, Miss Teschmacher? Sick, when I'm mere days from executing the crime of the century? No, no, no, no. Step away from that, please. How do you choose to congratulate the greatest criminal mind of our time? Huh? Huh? You tell me than I'm brilliant? Oh, no, no, that would be too obvious, I grant you. Charismatic. Fiendishly gifted, uh...
Miss Teschmacher: Try "twisted."
Superman: Is that how a warped brain like yours gets its kicks? By planning the death of innocent people?
Lex Luthor: No, by causing the death of innocent people.
Lex Luthor: Otis, is that the newspaper I asked you to get me?
Otis: Yeah.
Lex Luthor: Why am I not reading it?
Otis: [thinks for a second] 'Cause I haven't given it to you yet?
Lex Luthor: [smiles] Right...
[snatches the newspaper from Otis' hand]
Lex Luthor: You were great in your day, Superman. But it just stands to reason, when it came time to cash in your chips, this old... diseased... maniac would be your banker.
[the Amtrak train is racing down the tracks, when a giant hole starts to appear in the tracks in front of them from the earthquake. The engineer spots it]
Train Engineer #1: Holy MACKEREL!
[He hits the brakes, but realizes he will not be able to stop the train before it hits the gap]
Train Engineer #2: Hold her!
Train Engineer #1: We're going off the tracks!
[Superman dives into the gaping hole & positions himself on the right side of the rails, bridging the gap. He holds up the opposite rail with his arm, then lowers his head as the train hits the gap. The train passes over the gap safely, and the two stunned engineers look back]
Lex Luthor: [in Luthor's underground hideout] Miss Teschmacher, how many girls do you know who have a Park Avenue address like this one?
Miss Teschmacher: [sarcastically] Park Avenue address? Two hundred feet *below*?
First Elder: [after the Council of Elders has voted unanimously against Jor-El's desperate proposal] Any attempt by you to create a climate of fear and panic among the populace must be deemed by us an act of insurrection.
Jor-El: You would accuse me of insurrection? Has it now become a crime to cherish life?
First Elder: You would be banished to endless imprisonment in the Phantom Zone: the eternal void, which you yourself discovered.
Man in Street: I said, that'll be the day when a guy could fly, huh?
Clark Kent: Oh, I don't know. You'd be surprised.
Man in Street: Yeah.
Miss Teschmacher: Tell me something, Lex, why do so many people have to die for the crime of the century?
Lex Luthor: Why? You ask why? Why does the phone always ring when you're in the bathtub?
[walking away]
Lex Luthor: *Why* is the most diabolical leader of our time surrounding himself with total nincompoops?
Otis: I'm back, Mr. Luthor!
Lex Luthor: Yes, I was just talking about you.
Jor-El: [echo of the past] It is forbidden for you to interfere with human history.
Perry White: Now look. The Post: "It Flies." The News: "Look, Ma, No Wires." The Times: "Blue Bomb Buzzes Metropolis." The Planet. We're sitting on top of the story of the century here! I want the name of this flying whatchamacallit to go with the Daily Planet like bacon and eggs, franks and beans, death and taxes, politics and corruption.
Clark Kent: I don't think he would lend himself to any cheap promotion schemes though Mr. White.
Perry White: Exactly how you would you know that Kent?
Clark Kent: Um, just a first impression?
[a cat burglar is climbing up the side of a building. He looks up and sees Superman standing there]
Superman: Hi there. Something wrong with the elevator?
Lex Luthor: It's kryptonite, Superman. Little souvenir from the old home town. I spared no expense to make you feel right at home.
Perry White: Olsen! Why am I paying you forty dollars a week when I should have you arrested for loitering? Go get Mr... er...
Clark Kent: Kent.
Perry White: ...Kent here a towel!
Jimmy Olsen: Right, Chief.
Perry White: And make mine black and no sugar!
Jimmy Olsen: Right, Chief.
Perry White: And don't call me 'sugar'!
[the warden of a prison is sitting in his office when he hears the alarms sound & the guard dogs barking. He steps onto his balcony to see Superman flying into the prison yard, holding Luthor & Otis by the scruff of their jackets]
Lex Luthor: You're messing up my suit, you lummox, you!
Lex Luthor: [to Superman] Watch the ground!
[They land with a start. Luthor & Otis are immediately cornered by the guards]
Superman: Good evening, Warden. I think these 2 men should be safe here with you now till they can get a fair trial.
Warden: Who is it, Superman?
Lex Luthor: [Lex rips off his wig to reveal his bald head] Lex Luthor! The greatest criminal mind of our time!
Otis: [repeating what Lex says] ... Of our time!
Lex Luthor: I hereby serve notice...
Otis: He's serving notice to you...
Lex Luthor: That these walls...
Otis: That these walls here...
Lex Luthor: Will you shut up, please!
Superman: [to the guards] All right, take them away, boys!
[the guards take Luthor & Otis to a cell]
Lex Luthor: [shouting at Otis as the guards lead them away] Neanderthal! Nitwit! Nincompoop!
Miss Teschmacher: I wonder what they're wearing in Addis Ababa?
Lex Luthor: [to Otis] Do you know why the number two hundred is so vitally descriptive to both you and me? It's your weight and my I.Q.
Miss Teschmacher: [after learning that there is a missile heading toward Hackensack] Lex, my mother lives in Hackensack.
[Luthor checks his watch and shakes his head]
Superman: I never lie.
Lex Luthor: This is Lex Luthor. Only one thing alive with less than four legs can hear this frequency, Superman, and that's you.
Miss Teschmacher: [looking at Lex's newspaper] A meteorite found in Addis Ababa. Uh, I know I'm gonna get rapped in the mouth for this, but... So what?
Lex Luthor: So what. You mean, to us, they're just meteorites. Fair enough. But the level of *specific* radioactivity is so high, to anyone from the planet Krypton, this substance is *lethal*!
Otis: Wait a minute, Mr. Luthor. You mean, fire and bullets can't hurt this guy, but this stuff here...
Miss Teschmacher, Otis: [in unison] ... will kill him!
Lex Luthor: Doesn't it give you, like, a shudder of electricity... to be in the same room with me?
Miss Teschmacher: [laughs] Not like the shudder *you're* gonna get when you try to lay that rock on him. He can see you coming for miles with those super-peepers of his.
Lex Luthor: [obviously, he's already thought of this] "Oh, Lord... You gave them eyes, yet they cannot see." Nor can Superman, through lead.
Miss Teschmacher: [understanding] He... can't... see... through... lead!
Lex Luthor: And Kryptonite will destroy him. Any questions, class?