The House Bunny Quotes
After Playboy bunny Shelley is kicked out of the playboy mansion, she finds a job as the house mother for a sorority full of socially awkward girls.
Natalie: This is Harmony.
Shelley: [frog voice] Harmony.
[Harmony looks disturbed]
Natalie: And Carrie Mae.
Shelley: [frog voice] Carrie Mae.
Natalie: [points] And that's Joanne over there.
Shelley: [frog voice] Joanne.
[Joanne waves distributively]
Natalie: What is that? Is it like a Yoda, type of thing, I mean it's cool, fun, but?
Shelley: Oh, it's just this thing I do to remember people's names.
[frog voice]
Shelley: Natalie.
Mona: [sarcastically] Wow, you hired the exorcist, that's great!
Shelley: [frog voice] Harmony.
[Harmony looks disturbed]
Natalie: And Carrie Mae.
Shelley: [frog voice] Carrie Mae.
Natalie: [points] And that's Joanne over there.
Shelley: [frog voice] Joanne.
[Joanne waves distributively]
Natalie: What is that? Is it like a Yoda, type of thing, I mean it's cool, fun, but?
Shelley: Oh, it's just this thing I do to remember people's names.
[frog voice]
Shelley: Natalie.
Mona: [sarcastically] Wow, you hired the exorcist, that's great!
Shelley: I don't think he likes me. He didn't fall for any of my tricks.
Natalie: That's impossible. Your tricks always work.
Shelley: I did sexy. I did other guys want me. I worked every angle in the book but, I don't know, he just stared.
Natalie: What if Oliver is one of those guys who wants to have, like, a conversation with a girl before he hooks up with her.
Shelley: He's gay?
Natalie: That's impossible. Your tricks always work.
Shelley: I did sexy. I did other guys want me. I worked every angle in the book but, I don't know, he just stared.
Natalie: What if Oliver is one of those guys who wants to have, like, a conversation with a girl before he hooks up with her.
Shelley: He's gay?
Natalie: We could tie our shoes together, our tennis shoes, and we could throw them over telephone wires. Because I see that everywhere and it seems like people would have fun doing that. Like, how hard can you throw? You know what I mean? Like how - what are you -
[stops herself]
Natalie: [awkward pause]
Shelley: Or we could go to a club.
[stops herself]
Natalie: [awkward pause]
Shelley: Or we could go to a club.
Tyler: So, are you a Zeta?
Shelley: Oh! I wish.
Tyler: Yeah. I do too 'cause Zeta would be my favorite hizzity hang.
Natalie: Well, she is not a Zeta because she's our new hizzity house mother. She'll be hizzy-tizzy - - She'll be here all the time.
Shelley: You're hiring me?
[She hugs Natalie. The boys seem to like it and start making appreciative noises]
Natalie: Why are they acting like that?
Shelley: Boys just being boys. Thank goodness!
Shelley: Oh! I wish.
Tyler: Yeah. I do too 'cause Zeta would be my favorite hizzity hang.
Natalie: Well, she is not a Zeta because she's our new hizzity house mother. She'll be hizzy-tizzy - - She'll be here all the time.
Shelley: You're hiring me?
[She hugs Natalie. The boys seem to like it and start making appreciative noises]
Natalie: Why are they acting like that?
Shelley: Boys just being boys. Thank goodness!
Shelley: Natalie, Colby was following you around like a puppy dog. Do you guys think you'll, you know...
Natalie: No. I do not think, you know, THAT.
Shelley: That? Natalie, are you a virgin?
Natalie: No. Am I a virgin? No.
Shelley: You're a virgin!
[She says it a little too loudly and everyone in the quad stops in their tracks]
Natalie: Shhh. It's like an amphitheater in here.
Shelley: That's it. Oh my gosh. We have to have an Aztec party. We always wanted to have one at the mansion but we could never find a virgin to sacrifice.
Natalie: No. I do not think, you know, THAT.
Shelley: That? Natalie, are you a virgin?
Natalie: No. Am I a virgin? No.
Shelley: You're a virgin!
[She says it a little too loudly and everyone in the quad stops in their tracks]
Natalie: Shhh. It's like an amphitheater in here.
Shelley: That's it. Oh my gosh. We have to have an Aztec party. We always wanted to have one at the mansion but we could never find a virgin to sacrifice.
Shelley: I'm an expert at parties and boys! I'm a bunny! Men write to me from prison, sometimes even in their own blood, which I think is theirs, but I don't know, I'm really nervous because I really want to help.
Natalie: A-a bunny? You mean, like, centerfold?
Shelley: Oh, bless your heart, no, just a few pictorials, like "Girls from the Midwest" and "Girls with GEDs."
Natalie: A-a bunny? You mean, like, centerfold?
Shelley: Oh, bless your heart, no, just a few pictorials, like "Girls from the Midwest" and "Girls with GEDs."
Natalie: [taking pictures of Harmony for their calendar] Keep doing that. Keep doing that. Make love to the camera.
[laughs]
Natalie: I saw that in Austin Powers.
Shelley: Yeah. Work it. Think, really sexy witch. Are you a good witch or a bad witch?
Harmony: A good witch.
Shelley: I think you're a bad witch.
Harmony: Oh!
Shelley: Oh! I bet the house that falls on you is gonna be a sexy house.
Natalie: Work it. Work it. You're like a supermodel, except more pregnant.
[laughs]
Natalie: I saw that in Austin Powers.
Shelley: Yeah. Work it. Think, really sexy witch. Are you a good witch or a bad witch?
Harmony: A good witch.
Shelley: I think you're a bad witch.
Harmony: Oh!
Shelley: Oh! I bet the house that falls on you is gonna be a sexy house.
Natalie: Work it. Work it. You're like a supermodel, except more pregnant.
