An idiosyncratic FBI agent investigates the murder of a young woman in the even more idiosyncratic town of Twin Peaks.

Dale Cooper: Harry, I'm going to let you in on a little secret. Every day, once a day, give yourself a present. Don't plan it. Don't wait for it. Just let it happen. It could be a new shirt at the men's store, a catnap in your office chair, or two cups of good, hot black coffee.
[repeated line]
Dale Cooper: Damn good coffee!
Leland Palmer: Through the darkness of future past / The magician longs to see / One chants out between two worlds / Fire walk with me. I'll catch you with my death bag. You may think I've gone insane, but I promise I will kill again!
Dale Cooper: Harry, I have no idea where this will lead us, but I have a definite feeling it will be a place both wonderful and strange.
Giant: The owls are not what they seem.
James Hurley: When did you start smoking?
Donna Hayward: I smoke every once and a while. Helps relieve tension.
James Hurley: When did you get so tense?
Donna Hayward: When I started smoking.
Deputy Tommy 'Hawk' Hill: One woman can make you fly like an eagle, another can give you the strength of a lion, but only one in the Cycle Of Life can fill your heart with wonder and the wisdom that you have known a singular joy.
The Log Lady: Someday my log has something to say about this.
Man from Another Place: When we meet again, it won't be me.
Laura Palmer: I feel like I know her... but sometimes my arms bend back.
Dale Cooper: Ask me why I'm whittling.
Sheriff Truman: I give up. Why are you whittling?
Dale Cooper: Because that's what you do in a town where a yellow light still means slow down, not go faster.
Windom Earle: The only thing Columbus discovered was that he was lost!
Major Briggs: Achievement is its own reward, pride obscures it.
Jerry Horne: Sheriff, your 24 hours are up. I demand you to arrest my client or release him!
Sheriff Truman: Ben Horne, you are under arrest for the murder of Laura Palmer.
Ben Horne: Great move, Jer.
Man from Another Place: Where we're from, the birds sing a pretty song... and there's always music in the air.
Jerry Horne: I am 100% sure that we're not completely sure.
The Log Lady: My log saw something that night.
Sheriff Truman: Jelly donuts?
Dale Cooper: Harry, that goes without saying.
Dale Cooper: [Lucy pours Cooper a cup of coffee. He takes a sip and promptly spits it out]
Dale Cooper: Damn fine coffee! And hot!
Dale Cooper: In the grand design, women were drawn from a different set of blueprints.
DEA Agent Dennis: I understand we're both staying at the Great Northern. How's the food up there?
Dale Cooper: Dennis, you're in for a big surprise.
Sheriff Truman: So are they.
Dale Cooper: I believe I was visited by a giant last night. Twice.
FBI Agent Albert Rosenfield: Any relations with the dwarf?
Bobby Briggs: I got some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that your father has bought a condo in Flip City, and the good news is that he is about to win the Civil War.
FBI Regional Bureau Chief Gordon Cole: Cooper, you remind me today of a small Mexican chi-wow-wow.
Dale Cooper: Fellas, coincidence and fate figure largely in our lives.
Hank Jennings: You're his whore, Norma.
Norma Jennings: I'd rather be his whore than your wife.
Major Briggs: How was school, son?
Bobby Briggs: Fine. How was work?
Major Briggs: Work was fine.
Bobby Briggs: What exactly is it you do?
Major Briggs: That's classified.
FBI Special Agent Dale Cooper: [with a smile to Sheriff Truman] Harry, you're all right.
Dale Cooper: Harry, is that bag smiling?
[repeated line]
Dwayne Milford: [into a microphone] Is this thing on?
Catherine Packard Martell: Didn't he want to talk to me?
Pete Martell: Yeah, but we told him you were on your world tour, he should contact your press agent.
Ben Horne: We've lain a gala reception for your fair-haired boys tonight; all of Twin Peaks' best and brightest.
Jerry Horne: We're holding it in a phone booth?
Big Ed Hurley: It's not the first time, it won't be the last, but I'm in that doghouse again.
Blackie O'Reilly: Well Fred, what's your line?
Big Ed Hurley: [undercover] Own a gas station.
[Cooper nudges Ed in his side]
Big Ed Hurley: I'm an oral surgeon.
Blackie O'Reilly: Well, I got a Chevy parked out back with a serious root-canal problem. Want to take a look?
Donna Hayward: The police didn't love Laura, nobody loved Laura but us.
Annie Blackburn: [praying] Our bones are scattered at the grave's mouth / As when one cutteth wood upon the earth / But mine eyes are unto thee, O God The Lord: / In thee is my trust, leave not me / Keep me from the snares they have laid for me / And the gins of the workers of iniquity / Let the wicked fall into their own nets / Whilst that I withal escape.