A show that follows Bam Margera (of Jackass and CKY fame) in his attempts to anger his parents. Unlike CKY or Jackass, Viva La Bam focuses mainly on the torture of Bam's parents and less on harmful stunts.

Bam's Dad: What the hell are you doing here?
Oderus: I couldn't sleep upstairs, it frightens me!
Bam's Dad: But your friends are there, doesn't that make you...
Oderus: [shouts] They're not my friends!
Bam's Mom: Oh, my God! This is just like the Exorcist.
Bam Margera: Where are you going?
Bam's Mom: Paris. I've been telling you guys for three weeks! We're going for our anniversary
Bam's Crew: I wasn't listening
Bam Margera: Neither was I
Bam's Mom: Bam! Your friends just buried my car in snow!
Bam Margera: They're not my friends.
Bam's Uncle: Italy's shaped like a boot for a reason... so they can stick it up your ass.
Bam's Uncle: I wanna get leaning leaning tower of pizza and I'll be happy
Bam Margera: The Leaning Tower of what?
Bam's Uncle: Pizza
Bam Margera: Spell It
Bam's Uncle: P-I-Z-Z-A. Pizza. It's like a spelling bee you know. Pizza.
Bam Margera: Vito the whole world is laughing at you right now
Bam's Uncle: No they're not Bam. That's how you spell pizza. P-I-Z-Z-A.
Bam Margera: Yeah, that's how you spell "pizza" it's not The Leaning Tower of pizza, jackass!
Bam's Uncle: That's where it came from, Bam, Italy. You don't know nothing abou Italy.
Bam Margera: [Hangs head laughing]
Bam Margera: What country are we in?
Bam's Uncle: Switzer-Land Bam.
Bam Margera: And what are ya wearing?
Bam's Uncle: The Liederhosen you gave me.
Bam's Uncle: [In Pisa, Italy] The whole goddamn city is named after pizza
Bam Margera: It's Pisa
Bam Margera: Yeah, but that's "pizza" in Italian
Bam Margera: Looks like we're ready for Monaco. Ready to go outside?
Bam's Uncle: Yeah Bam I just wanna go to the beach.
Bam Margera: Do you know the rules of Monaco?
Bam's Uncle: Naw they got stupid rules...
Bam Margera: You cant talk loud.
Bam's Uncle: ...itza stupid kazixta stupid country, datzall i know.
Bam Margera: -whispering- Whisper.
Bam's Uncle: Whisper What?
Bam Margera: -whispering- Whisper, Shhhhh.
Bam's Uncle: What whisper then we'll get outta this town, and I can get outta this suit if I whisper?
Bam Margera: -whispering- Yes whisper.
Bam's Uncle: -whispering- I'll whisper lets go... I hate Monaco... Pistachio... Pistachio.
Bam Margera: Row your boat!
Bam's Uncle: Row my boat where? Gently down the stream?
Bam's Crew: How are we going to spot 'em?
Bam's Crew: Are you kidding? We're looking for Phil. He's not too hard to pick out.
Bam's Crew: He's like the size of three Frenchmen!
Bam's Crew: [Sitting in bath full of cocoa and marshmellows] This is kind of nice
Bam's Dad: Turned out alright didn't it?
Bam's Crew: Yeah
Bam's Dad: It's comfortable in here!
Police Officer: Don't do anything stupid
Bam Margera: I wasn't planning on it
Police Officer: Good... 'cause I'll arrest your ass!
Bam's Uncle: [Repeated] Yo!
Bam's Mom: [after Bam and friends fill April's car with snow] I'm gonna have to call a cab
Bam Margera: There is no cab companies in West Chester
Bam's Mom: I'm gonna call the Purple Cab Company
Bam's Crew: I've never heard of Purple Cab. There's only Rainbow Cab.
Bam's Mom: [Few moments later April drives up the drive in Bam's purple Lambo] -in mocking tone- "There's no Purple Cab company"
Bam Margera: [Everybody laughing] Get out of that!
Bam Margera: [Bam chases the car for a moment as April drives away] I was gonna throw a snowball at it but then I remembered it was mine!
Colin Morrison: [drives his bike through a glass door in the house]
Bam's Mom: Am I the only normal one here?
Bam's Uncle: No, Ape, I'm normal.
Bam's Mom: Oh, God! You're so not normal!
Bam's Uncle: What are you? Retarded or something?
Himself - Bam's Crew: There's a filthy virus that grows in this room, and it's called lying-itis!
Himself - Bam's Crew: Have you ever had a boyfriend?
Bam's Crew: No
[polygraph machine says he is lying]
Bam's Dad: [after April kisses Bam goodbye] If she kisses you, I can kiss you. I hope you know that. Bye Bye.
[Tries to kiss Bam]
Bam Margera: Ew! Get away!
Bam's Dad: When she kisses I kiss
Bam's Crew: This guy's not even in France yet, and already he's acting all weird
Bam's Crew: H.R Kissnshit!
Himself - Bam's Crew: It's fucking called Gobbler's Knob? Hey, Rake it's your favourite place.
Bam's Uncle: I'm gonna kill your plane, you watch!
Johnny Knoxville: Jesus, That's... That is so hateful...!
Bam's Uncle: Come near me again, I'll kill ya.
[from the opening creditd]
Announcer: Bam Margera. What will he do next?
Bam Margera: Whatever the fuck I want.
Bam Margera: Merry Christmas, ya little yerks!
Tow-truck Driver: Shut the truck off!
Himself - Bam's Crew: "Shut the fuck up"?
Jimmy Pop: Have you ever tried calling you? I called you like 17 times. And I even left messages, and I even say dirty things on it to think that will make you mad and all fired up, and you'll call me.
Tim O'Conner: [while in France] Don't look American!
Bam Margera: Is that all you do is bitch?
Bam's Mom: I bitch because you're my*son*!
Himself - Bam's Crew: [after he trash a bakery and April tells him off] You're insane!
Oderus: [shouts] Where is Bam Bam?
Jimmy Pop: [talking to Bam about polygraph machines] Oh, come on. Those don't work. Can I kiss you?
Bam's Crew: We just had to carry with fat Vito...
Bam's Crew: [kisses Raab]
Bam's Crew: That makes it all better
Bam Margera: Well if Bran and Rake aren't going then I gotta call my friends, The Dudesons!
Bam's Crew: That one guy doesn't shut the hell up. Please don't call!
George Ex CIA opperative: Friend, you ever have a polygraph before?
Brandon Novak: Yes
George Ex CIA opperative: Did you? How'd you do? Really good, I bet.
Brandon Novak: Uh... I got six months.
[everybody laughs]
Himself - Bam's Crew: Hey, Lady, do you like my surveillance table? It's the damndest.
Bam Margera: Dico, you coming to Mexico?
Himself - Bam's Crew: No, all the video games suck ther. What am I gonna play, Outre Kombat? El Street Fight Grande?
Bam Margera: Don't be a pussy Phil.
Bam Margera: I took H.I.M.'s tour bus!
Bam's Uncle: Do you wanna die or do ya wanna live? Live or die?
Bam's Crew: [after putting frogs in Bam's tent] I guess he didn't find his prince. Maybe he should have kissed one.
Bam Margera: Vito, you're borderline fat.
Himself - Bam's Crew: Don Vito is so fat, his blood consists of mayonnaise.
Bam's Uncle: Best Germany ever.
Bam's Crew: You can't give me one snap.
Himself - Bam's Crew: The food train has arrived, sire. Who ordered a side of style? At home, we call this "portions galore"! Enjoy.
[after Vito made Bams Hummer drive off that cliff thing]
Bam Margera: Vito... I'm proud of you! You thought this all through!
Tim O'Conner: [Repeated] Oh, my God!
Himself - Bam's Crew: And I didn't take it, because a man with no hair couldn't take it possibly!
Jared 'Evil' Hasselhoff: Don't worry. We can fix this. My dad's a tv repairman. He's got the ultimate set of tools.
Jarpi: [Jarpi is jabbering away in Finnish]
Bam Margera: He just said every Finnish word in the fucking dictionary in a matter of five minutes
Bam Margera: [turns to Jarpi] All right. All right, enough. No more Finland talk!
Himself - Bam's Crew: Veal Scaloppini rhymes with Lamborghini. And they're both Italian!

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