Barbara Deming — American Author died on December 29, 1984

Barbara Deming was an American feminist and advocate of nonviolent social change... (wikipedia)

To resort to power one need not be violent, and to speak to conscience one need not be meek. The most effective action both resorts to power and engages conscience.
This is the heart of my argument: We can put more pressure on the antagonist for whom we show human concern.
Vengeance is not the point; change is. But the trouble is that in most people's minds the thought of victory and the thought of punishing the enemy coincide.
Punishment cannot heal spirits, can only break them.
We believe, in fact, that the one act of respect has little force unless matched by the other - in balance with it... The acting out of that dual respect I would name as precisely the source of our power.