Gilbert Gottfried Quotes

Gilbert Gottfried — American Comedian born on February 28, 1955,

Gilbert Gottfried is an American stand-up comedian, actor and voice artist. His numerous roles in film and television include voicing the parrot Iago in Disney's Aladdin and Digit in the children's cartoon/educational math-based show Cyberchase. Gottfried was also the voice of the Aflac Duck until 2011... (wikipedia)

I always wish the hotels were like they are in movies and TV shows, where if you're in Paris, right outside your window is the Eiffel Tower. In Egypt, the pyramids are right there. In the movies, every hotel has a monument right outside your window. My hotel rooms overlook the garbage dumpster in the back alley.

With me, traveling for work is arriving at the airport, checking into the hotel, leaving the hotel the next morning at 4 or 5 to do something like 'The Jimmy and Jackie Captain Crazy Morning Zoo,' doing a bunch of those in a row, then going back to the hotel, and then finally going to the club.

If someone else is paying for it, food just tastes a lot better.

I was Jewish, through and through, although in our house that didn't mean a whole lot. We never went to synagogue. I never had a Bar Mitzvah. We didn't keep kosher or observe the Sabbath. In fact, I'm not so sure I would have known what the Sabbath looked like if it passed me on the street, so how could I observe it?

I can't even find someone for a platonic relationship, much less the kind where someone wants to see me naked.

Gilbert Gottfried Quotes

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