Oliver Herford — American Author born on December 30, 1863,

Oliver Herford was an American writer, artist and illustrator who has been called "The American Oscar Wilde". As a frequent contributor to The Mentor, Life, and Ladies' Home Journal, he sometimes signed his artwork as "O Herford". In 1906 he wrote and illustrated the Little Book of Bores. He also wrote short poems like "The Chimpanzee" and "The Hen", as well as writing and illustrating "The Rubaiyat of a Persian Kitten" and "Excuse It Please". His sister Beatrice Herford was also a humorist... (wikipedia)

Modesty: the gentle art of enhancing your charm by pretending not to be aware of it.
Darling: the popular form of address used in speaking to a member of the opposite sex whose name you cannot at the moment remember.
A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often.
Many are called but few get up.
Tact: to lie about others as you would have them lie about you.